The Game of Money, Sex and Love
by alwayzlove40
Summary: Edward and Bella work together in a sporting goods store. Bella is instantly attracted to Edward but Edwards actions throw Bella for a loop. Formally "Back Room Fun and Love" and the story behind "Staff Fun". Warning:lemons and bad language
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey everybody! I'm back yayyyyy! This story will be different to "back room fun and love" hence the new name but some chapters will be the same. This chapter is mostly the same but I have added a little bit here and there! For those who are just new reading this just to point out Bella, Alice and Rose are all adopted sisters of Charlie and Edward and Emmett are Carlise's sons and Jasper is their best friend. Charlie and Carlise are just very good friends so even though the girls call Carlise uncle...he isn't actually there uncle. Also juicy juicy lemons won't be till bot chapter 3...sorry! On with the story...**

*** THEY ARE NOT RELATED...to clarify* **

**Bella's POV:**

I don't understand how I got to this stage in my life. It's 11.34am on a Thursday and I am lying here still in bed thinking what am I going to do with my life. Let me fill you in...last Monday I graduated from high school in Seattle with my adopted sisters Alice and Rose. I have been accepted into University to complete my bachelor of physiotherapy ,so you would think my life would be pretty great. Here's the catch though, I currently have zero dollars to my name, na da, zilch, I am flat broke! Registration and insurance will soon be due on my car and I have no way to pay for it. I wish I could get a job to solve all my money woes but because of the recent recession no one Is currently hiring, damn them all to hell!

Rose, Alice and I all live together in our fantastic flat our father charlie paid for when we all decided we wanted to go to high school in Seattle instead of Forks. Charlie decided he didn't want to hold us back but with his job as chief of police in Forks he couldn't just up and leave. So instead he got use a great flat in central Seattle right near our school and set us up with credit cards to pay for food and bills. Even though his my father, I still feel guilty for all the money I spend even if it is for necessities. I want to establish financial independence and have some money to my name. I want to be able to own things and them be brought with my own money. I WANT A JOB!

I was still sulking in my room when all of a sudden Alice and Rose burst into my room and start singing, dancing and jumping on my bed yelling like idiots. Both my sisters are absolutely stunning with Alice being a five foot nothing little fashion crazy pixie and Rose being a blonde bombshell look a like super model, its pretty safe to say I'm not the "pretty sister". Its a good thing I love them as much as I do or else I would be extremely jealous of them. All of a sudden Alice screamed

" I'm gonna be rich, fucking rich!", I sat up like I had been struck like lighting. How is he going to be rich when she has no job either, she should be laying right next to me sulking too as we held our own pity party. They were jumping around all happy so I yelled

"How are you going to be rich, you don't have a job?".

" I do now! Correction ..we do now!" Alice yelled at the end.

"what are you talking about?" I asked as I looked at Rose who was still bouncing around on my bed smiling like she just saw the sun for the first time in her life. Alice sat down next to me and started to fill me in on how uncle Carlise just called and informed Alice how 3 of his part time staff of his sporting goods store had just quite as they are moving over seas and offered us girls jobs to replace them. I jumped up just as Alice did and we joined Rose who was still bouncing on the bed. Rose then decided to start talking and told me how Uncle Carlise's sons Edward and Emmett work at the store too, as well as there best friend Jasper. They will be the boys who train us to do our jobs and help us out. I have known Carlise for all my life and talk to him all the time but weirdly I have not seen his sons in over 11 years.

" I wonder what they look like now?" Rose ask.

" I don't know I haven't seen them in ages" I responded.

"Well, we start tomorrow and Carlise said he is going to call a staff meeting so we can meet them all. Oh my god! I need to plan what we are going to wear!" Alice said as she jumped of the bed and ran out the door.

"Come on Belly, we HAVE to start preparing for tomorrow. I want to make an awesome first impression" Rose said as she all but dragged me out of my room. Dear god I knew what that means..Make overs...Noooooooo!

**THE NEXT DAY:**

After hours of hair treatments, waxing, plucking, manicures, pedicures and facials I finally crashed into bed at 11pm last night and I have never been more thankful for sleep. My time in my comfy bed was short lived however as Alice burst in my bedroom at 6am screaming

"FIRE! THE FUCKING FLAT IS ON FIRE...MOVE MOVE MOVE!" that's when I also heard the fire alarm beeping. In 2 seconds flats I had ripped my blankets off, jumped out of bed and dragging Alice out the screaming

"ROSE FIRRRRRREEEEEEE!". I came to a sudden halt however when I ran into the living room to see Rose standing on a chair with a match lit under the fire alarm. Alice and Rose burst into a fit of laughter as I saw red. I started yelling

"You STUPID bitch's almost gave me a heart attack, I hate you both! Go to hell!". Rose finally stopped laughing and said

"I'm sorry Bella... we just couldn't bothered with your whole ' I don't want to go to school today mum bitch bitch bitch moan moan moan' bit you do whenever you have to get up early." impersonating me, horribly I might add, as she bobbed her head back and forth.

"Whatever, I'm getting in the shower. I'm all high on adrenaline now, I defiantly cant sleep again" I said before walking into the bathroom muttering

"Stupid bitches could have killed me..." as I closed the door.

"Love you too sunshine" Alice yelled sarcastically through the door. I put my iPod on the iPod doc on the vanity and put on some Paramore to listen to while I shower. I instantly felt better as I scrubbed myself stupid while dancing and singing my heart away. I know most people are able to escape their normal lives when they sleep, for me it happens when I'm in the shower. Currently I am dreaming that I am Hayley Williams, the lead singer for Paramore, as I head bang and sing Misery Business into my loofah. Life my suck for me at the moment, but at least I'm still having some fun.

***3 hours later***

We were all now dressed in Alice approved clothes with our hair and make-up done to perfection as we walked into the store. I was wearing dark blue jeans, a tight white tank top with and hot olive vest with black ballet flats. My hair was in loose curls and my make-up was done very neutral which is how I like it. Alice was in a dark green dress that was tight at the top and bubbled at her hips with a big belt around her waist. She also had on black peep toe heels with her hair done all spiky and make-up on. Rose just wore I tight red tank top, black jeans and black closed in heels. Her hair was in loose curls too and her make-up done so she looked absolutely floor-less. I honestly didn't understand why we needed to put in all the effort to get dressed nice when we would just be getting changed into uniform anyway. I would voice my opinion on the matter but Alice just looked like she was itching to take me down a notch, so I just shut up and walked. As we entered the store a very attractive blonde boy was standing behind the counter. Alice mummer quickly under her breath so only us girls could hear

"Shot gun the blonde hottie". Rose and I just laughed and look at Alice to see a sinister smile plastered on her face. We found out the "hotties" name was Jasper as he gave us our uniforms and told us to change in the change rooms. Once we were all dressed in our dark gray polo top uniforms that had 'Cullen' written on the back in white and black baggy tracksuit pants, that little Alice almost had an aneurism about how ugly they were, and runners we we all set to go. We were led through the back room and to another side room which we later found out was the 'staff room'. It was a rather large room with a huge conference table in it that could easily sit 10 people, as well as a fridge, 2 couches and a microwave. Us girls sat down at the table with Jasper and was busy making small talk waiting for the others to arrive. I saw out the corner of my eye a familiar mop of blonde hair...i shrieked and launched myself at it.

"UNCLE CARLISE!" I screamed as I hugged him tightly. He picked me up and spun we round before setting me back down on my feet. Alice and Rose then rushed over to hug him as well. I went to speak again to talk to Uncle Carlise some more and catch up when the door suddenly flew open making a loud bang noise as it hit the wall behind it, making me jump in fright. I turned to the door just in time to see a godly creature walk in. He was a 6 foot tall, pale skin, bronze sex haired god! He also has two tattoo's, one that is of a grim reaper that covers the entire side of his upper left leg and the other which I later found out from Jasper was his parents names in Latin on the underside of his right upper arm. All that together with his lip ring makes me want to come at the very sight of him. He turned his head to look at me and then looked away dismissively, as if I wasn't even standing there.

About 2 seconds later another boy came in but he was very different from the last. He was built as big as a coke machine with legs. He had short curly hair and muscles everywhere. He had a goofy smile on his face and instead of ignoring us him came over and gave us all a big hug. I instantly liked him and I could tell Rose did to as I saw her smoothly transform into flirty Rose. Her stance and facial expression changed as she became sexy Rose. Yep defiantly more than likes him.

"OK, now that your all here lets sit down team." Carlise said as he gestured towards the table. We all sat down and as Carlise was introducing us and I stared at who I now know to be Edward, all I could think was this is gonna be a long day...

**A/N: There the first chapter to a new beginning! I no, first chapters not that great like last time but I promise it will get HEAPS better...better than before!**

**Please please please please please review!**

**All my love xoxoxo**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey pretty people, Thank-you all so much for following this story and following my creative direction. This is a completely NEW CHAPTER! So I hope you all like it :) This is a thank-you prezzie for all those who have warmly welcomed me! **

**For future reference I will be updating every Sunday night(my time)...yayyy! Anyways enjoy...**

**Bella's POV:**

For the past hour and a half I have been stuck in my own personal version of hell! Alice can not stop bitching and complaining about the uniform and how hideous it is. She spent a solid 40 minutes begging uncle Carlise to let her re-design them or at let tapper them in to make them more form fitting for us ladies. Carlise kept shutting her down as much as he hated to do it, it warmed my heart however to see Jasper move to comfort Alice, while she sulked like a 4 year old who got their lolly pop stolen off them. Emmett and Rose were barley able to participate in conversation because they were to busy throwing each other smiles or winks and then laughing about it. They were very smitten with each other, as were Alice and Jasper. Too bad not everyone was as warmly welcomed to the company, Edward is still yet to every look at me, not even a hello to actually acknowledged my presence or the fact that I do actually exist...prick!

I could tell by the air of arrogance he had and the cocky expression that was on his face that he thinks very highly of himself. Girls must throw themselves at him because after all he is devastatingly beautiful. I know beautiful is a odd way to describe a man but that is the only word that I can think of that seems to fit. Between his pearl like luminous skin and his chiseled jaw line, top it all off with his bronze sex hair and I could just about cum at the sight of him. Suddenly I broke out of my day dream to realize that Carlise is talking about something of importance and I better start paying attention.

" You guys will be working in pairs and doing 4 hour shifts together. The shop is open 7 days a week from 9am to 5pm. The days will be split in two to create a morning shift and an afternoon shift. The morning shift is from 9am till 1pm and the afternoon shift will last from 1pm to 5 pm. You will have you regular day shift during the week, I find you will like it better that way than it always be changing around. It will allow you to have regular time off, however once university starts of course we will be working around all your time tables. Working on a Saturday or Sunday means extra pay so we will be alternating them shift, just to make it fair. Boys will be paired up with girls, especially during training for the girls. So hear is the roster for the rest week, lets get to it. Girls I hope you love it here and if you have any questions you know my number... and where I live!"

We all laughed at that as we all moved to look at the roster he had placed on the table. I saw Carlise leaving out the corner of my eye, so I jumped up out of my seat and gave him a big hug right before he hit the door. He jumped a little in fright, and then gave a light chuckle as hugged me back.

"Thank-you Uncle Carlise..." I said softly while hugging him so just he could hear. He kissed the top of my head a whispered back to me

"No worries little poss!" I laughed at my old nickname, meaning little possum. After one last squeeze we let each other go and went our separate ways, promising to call each other later tonight. Walking back to the rest of them surrounding the roster still, I saw Edward giving me a strange look after seeing my clear display of affection towards his father. Not wanting to explain it all, I just ducked my head to avoid eye contact and studied the roster. I saw that I was not rostered on for today which I was happy about. I was working tomorrow(Saturday) from 9-1 with Jasper and then Sunday from 1-5 with Edward. I was quite happy just to be working at all so with that I said my good byes and Rose and I left. Rose rushed us home because she had to start work in an hour with Emmett and she wanted to fix herself up. I decided to go for a jog been as I had nothing else planned. So after a quick lunch and getting changed I grabbed my ipod and was on my way.

I love my ipod so much because I simply love music. The only bad thing about it is that it has so many different styles on it, sometimes your just not in the mood for what comes up on the shuffle. I mean who wants to jog listening to Frank Sinatra...come on! After skipping 10 songs I finally found one that fitted my current situation perfectly and made me jog with an extra bounce in my step. It was "That don't impress me much" by Shania Twain.

I saw a mammoth hill coming up so I powered up it as I listened to the inspiring song. It reminded me so much of Edward, how cocky and full of himself he acts. It takes more than I pretty face to impress me, being vain is not a attractive quality at all. I thought it was down right rude and disrespectful the way he acted today. I wasn't asking for him to gush over me or anything but a simple "Hello, nice to meet you" would have gone a long way in my books.

Edward seems to be one of those guys that you see walk all over girls and treat them like fucking shit and yet that girl always comes crawling back for more. Well not me mister, if he is rude to me well I am not he type of girl to be grovelling for his acceptance. I am a strong and independent woman, sure he may star in a couple of my self lovin sessions but I will not excuse his rudeness and act like it is OK, it is not OK. I won't be a bitch and I sure as hell won't be confronting him because I don't have it in may nature, so silence seems to be the answer. He wants to not say a word to me, well right back at you buddy. Of course I will still say "Hello, how are you?" because after all I don't want to stoop down to his level, but that is all he is going to be getting out of me until he shows some kindness my way. I reached the top of the hill and broke out into song and dance, singing

"_Ohwooh, you think you're special  
>Ohwooh, you think you're something else<em>

_Ok, so you're Brad Pitt..._

_That don't impress me much!_  
><em>So you got the looks but have you got the touch?<em>  
><em>(Now) Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright<em>  
><em>But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night<em>  
><em>That don't impress me much!<em>

_You're one of those guys who likes to shine's machine_  
><em>You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in<em>  
><em>I can't believe you kiss your car good night<em>  
><em>C'mon baby tell me, you must be joking, right?<em>

_Ohwooh, you think you're special_  
><em>Ohwooh, you think you're something else<em>

_Ok, so you got a car..."_

I broke out of my singing and dance solo and started jogging my way home while singing the rest of the song in my head as I went.

I finally got home and took a much needed shower to get all the sweat off my body. I then looked at the time and decided to start cooking dinner for us girls. I just finished making pasta when Rose walked through the door home from work. I called Alice out for dinner who was currently shopping on-line. We all sat around the dinner table, as we always do and began to talk about our very eventful day. Rose rambled on and on about how great Emmett was and how work just flew by as they both exchanged there life stories. I was so happy for her as she deserved a good guy, not some sleaze who was just into her looks. Alice also was very happy about her day but for a completely different reason. She was just happy because she got to fit a cute toddler for his first pair of shoes.

"It was _so_ adorable!" She squealed. She was on shift with Edward today so I decided to ask how he was with her.

"How was Edward today? Did he talk much with you?" I asked.

"He was fine. After being told what to do we were pretty busy and didn't get much time to talk." She said as she shrugged her shoulders. I wanted to grill her some more but the phone rang so I got up to answer it.(Bella, _Carlise_)

"Hello"

"_Hey Bella, It's Carlise."_

"UNCLE CARLISE!" I squealed in excitement as I love hearing from him. I heard him laughing at the other end.

"_How did the girls like their first day?"_ He asked.

"They loved it! We were actually just talking about how much they enjoyed it, thank you so much for this."

"_That's OK Bella, I'm happy to be able to help you girls out. Listen the reason I am calling is that when I got home Edward was asking how I knew you girls. I explain how I am close with your father and have seen you girls grow up. He noticed how close I am with you in particular though and began to ask more questions..."_

"You didn't tell him did you? You know how I hate peoples knowing.."

"_Relax! I didn't tell him. It's your story to tell and besides he knows about my days as a doctors but not specifically you."_

"Ohhh good. I just don't like how people treat me differently after they know. Ya know?"

"_That's OK Bella, I understand. Your a tough little cookie. I just thought I'd give you a heads up in case he asks you too."_

"Thanks Uncle Carlise, I appreciate it."

"_No worries little possum! Well I better go but we will talk soon and give you a check-up OK?"_

"OK, have a good night!"

"_You too, bye."_

"Bye"

I hung up the phone and took a few deep breaths to calm myself down. Thank god Carlise didn't tell him, the last thing I needed was his pity. We decided to watch the movie "Thor" before all going to bed early, after all I had work in the morning!

**A/N: Sooooo did you like it? Let me no what you think?**

**Please review review review! Because reviews make me happy and when im happy I write :)**

**All my love**

**xoxoxo **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey pretty people, I hope you all liked chapter two and now I really hope you like this chapter! I told you I would update today so here I am! Anyways on with the new chappie...**

**Bella's POV:**

I woke up at the crack of dawn for some strange reason and could not get back to sleep. After tossing and turning for two hours I finally decided to get up and have some breakfast. I took my time getting ready for my first official day at work and then made my way into the store.

By the time I got to work it was 8.45am, which I thought it was perfect timing on my behalf because after all who would want to be late on their first day. Jasper appeared to have perfect timing too because as soon as I stepped out of my car I saw him standing at the front door to the shop, opening up. I quickly made my way into the store to and immediately greeted him upon entering. His face lit up with a smile when he saw me, I immediately felt calm and welcomed in his presence. Any worry or anxiety I was feeling for starting new today was swept out of my body to leave me happy and calm.

Jasper then spent the next hour teaching me everything I would need to know to be able to operate the store efficiently. I learned everything from how to operate the till to how the stock is ordered in the back room and on the shop floor. I even learned how to use the pricing gun which I thought was pretty cool. Jasper was an amazing teacher and incredibly patient with me, even thought I felt I was keeping up with everything just fine. Once I was caught up on what to do and there was no customers around, we then took the time to get to know each other. I could tell he would be a great match for Alice, the ying to her yang. He would be exactly the right guy to calm down her energizer bunny ways and would treat her how a gentleman should treat a lady. Deep down inside I wanted to grill Jasper about everything that is Edward but I refrained because I didn't want to seem too nosey or keen on him. Instead I went for a more casual approach as I smoothly mentioned

"So what the deal with Edward?". Jasper started to laugh loudly at my question and the jokingly said

"Who would know...". This brought a frown to my face because I wasn't getting the answers I wanted, Jasper must of seen my face because he continued saying

"Edward is a very complex man but once you get to know him, I promise he is a great friend. He may take a while to warm to you but eventually you will see the real him. You will be amazed how different he actually is to the act he puts on.". Jasper then questioned me all about Alice until it was the end of our shift. I actually enjoyed myself at work today and I could only hope that tomorrows shift will go just as well.

I got up early the next morning to make myself look pretty and presentable for my first shift for work. We were spos to be 10 minutes early for our shifts, of course being the good little diligent worker I am I got here 12 minutes early. Unfortunately I had not been issued a key yet to open up the shop, so that left me waiting for Edward. I was sitting in front of the shop door freezing my tits off for 22 minutes when Edward finally decided to arrive. Instead of looking at me and saying " sorry for being late I got held up", he didn't even look at me as he opened the shop doors and walked straight in. I was livid! So I stood up and stormed in the store shouting at him

"So nice of you to grace us with your presence Edward!". He turned around and with a smirk on his face said

" What are you going to do, tell _Uncle Carlise_ on me!It's clear your his favorite, your practically his fucking pet!" With his horrible impersonation of me I went from livid to absolutely furious. I will never let anyone talk bad about Carlise or my relationship with him in my presence, even if he is his son. I said with all the venom in my voice I could muster

" Shut the fuck up! Just shut your face because you don't no what your fucking talking about!". I quickly rushed past Edward and into the back room, needing a few minutes to calm down. Edward must have been able to tell he hit a nerve because he dropped the topic once I returned to the shop floor. Thankfully it was a pretty busy day in the shop so Edward and I didn't need to talk. I was quite enjoying myself until I saw a tall, fake looking, young, blonde woman come into the store. Her big fake tits were bursting out of her bra and top as she practically rubbed them in Edwards face. She was flirting her ass off and to my disgust Edward was flirting back. I looked over at the two of them just in time to see Edward look down her top. I felt a red hot burning sensation flood through my veins but for the life of me I could not figure out what emotion I was feeling. I was mad and confused so I decided to just let it all go and focus on the task at hand.

About 2 hours later the shop began to slow down and of the first time the was no customers left for me to serve. I looked over at Edward who was serving a young dad and his son, they seemed to be buying a soccer ball. The son only seemed to be around 4 years old and my heart warmed when I saw Edward begin playing with him. He was teasing the boy with the ball and then kicking it away at the last minute when the boy would reach for it, then they would both laugh about it. At moments like this Edward seemed like a completely different person to the man I knew. He was free, light hearted and carried no air of arrogance. I loved this Edward. Watching him with a smile on his face, genuinely happy I had an epiphany...i liked Edward Cullen! Holy shit, it all made sense now. The weird feelings I felt when I saw him with that other woman...it was jealousy!

Trust me to like a guy that is so emotionally unavailable, someone who seemed like such a playboy! God sometimes I hate my life...i hate it so much right now because now all I want is him. So I will try and get him, I have to at least try right...let the games begin!

***3 Months Later***

I cannot believe how something which is suppose to be so simple, has become so complex. I mean, how hard is it to get a boy to like you and be interested in you...apparently very hard when Edward fucking Cullen is involved. Rose and Alice had no trouble snagging their men, the lucky bitches. Alice and Jasper started going out almost a week after meeting each other while Rose and Emmett took a bit longer, officially going out after about a month after meeting.

Alice and Jasper have organized to always have their shifts at work together to spend more time together, as have Emmett and Rose. I was a bit sad at first when I found out I wouldn't be spending my time at work with my sisters. However when I found out that it meant I would be spending all my time with Edward, my mood significantly improved.

Playing hard to get was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Every shift I was rostered on to work I would come in and say hello to Edward, he would either say hello back or nod his head at me in acknowledgment. I would then stand there and wait for him to say something, anything, but no he always remained silent.

One Thursday, it was a very slow day when a young man walked in the door. He was about the same age as me and wore jeans, a thin navy blue hoodie with white canvas shoes. He had clear pale skin with short black hair that was slightly longer at the front and was very attractive. I approached him as he turned to face the shoe wall which displayed our large of mens shoe's we sold. I walked to the side of him and said

" Hello, how you you?". He turned from the shoe's to face me. He smirked as he looked me up in down in my uniform polo, ¾ length tight black leggings and nike runners.

"I'm good thanks. How are you?" He said with a smile. I turned my head quickly and saw that Edward was watching our encounter, so I decided to flirt a bit with the customer in hopes of making Edward jealous and show him that if he wants me he needs to make a move because if he doesn't some other boy will.

"I'm very well thank-you." I said with a seductive smile. I continued saying

"Did you need any help getting fitted so you know what size you were or help picking a style?".

"Well as much as I would have loved the sight of you on your knees in front on me, I already know I'm a size 11 and I want the blue, white and silver Nike high tops you have here." He said smoothly as he picked up the shoes he wanted of the display wall to show me exactly which ones he wanted.

"No trouble. I'll just go get your size out from the back room, won't be long" I said with a smile as I walked away to get his shoes. I kept on smiling as I past Edward but as soon as I was in the back room I let me smile fall. WHAT A FREAK! Who says stuff like to a sales assistant? I continued to act like I was flattered by it though because I was determined to prove myself to Edward but inside I was creeped out. I plastered a fake smile back on my face as I exited the back room with the guy's shoes. I approached him again and asked if he wanted to try them on.

"No thanks babe, I'm in a bit of a hurry and don't really have time" He told me as we walked towards the counter. I processed his sale and put through his payment then sent him on his way with a smile. I started to laugh when I looked at the merchant copy of the receipt and saw he had written '_Call me Jamie- 0411 670 288' _on the back when he was signing it. I looked at Edward who was standing on the other side of the counter and was frowning at me. So I got out my phone at pretended to enter the number to hopefully get to Edward.

Not one person came into the store for the last 2 hours of our shift. I was standing there just waiting for Edward to strike up conversation so we could get to no each other. Anything would have been fine but no, for 2 hours we stood there in silence just listening to the radio playing through the store speakers...FUCK MY LIFE!

**A/N: So what did you think...did you enjoy this chapter? and for those who read back ****room did you enjoy the new stuff!**

**please please please review...it makes me so happy :)**

**All my love**

**xoxoxoxox **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my loves, I am soooooooooo sorry I have been completely swamped and havn't had time to write until now, FML! Anyways I just wanted to thank PennieLane1223, snottyscottie and Meggiemoo02! you guys are amazing and I love you all! anyways on with the story...**

**Bella's POV:**

I had completely cracked the shits by the time that I got home and was ready to just get in the bath and drown myself in self loathing. I hated myself for how much I could like someone when they could barley give me the time of day. I hated myself for the pathetic little girl I have became instead of the strong independent woman I once was.

I ripped open the door to our apartment and began to storm in when I suddenly came to a halt. Clothes were being thrown everywhere, full alcohol bottle's littered the kitchen bench and Alice and Rose were running around like headless chooks and screaming over the Lady Gaga they had playing loudly. I came to a realization of what I was seeing and screamed

"We're going OUT!". Rose emerged from her room with a big smile on her face, in her dressing gown with make-up done and her hair still in curling rolls. Alice was right behind her looking much the same only her hair was already done since it was so short. Next thing I know, _gone_ is the mopey Bella that wanted to jump off a bridge and in her place was a extremely happy Bella that just wanted to dance the night away and get drunk to forget all her problems. The three of us were dancing on the couch and chanting "We are going ouuttt, we are going ouuttt!" over and over again. It got old after about 4 minutes so I sat down and asked to be filled in. Alice immediately raveled off the entire story

"Well, Jasper's friend's dad has just opened a new club in town and tonight is there opening night! His friends name is David and David asked Jasper if he could come and bring a group as they want a big opening crowd. Jasper of course, could never say no to a friend so that is why the six of us are going!"

"WOW hold up! What _six_ of us?" I asked in a slow calculated voice.

"You know, the six of us. You, me, Rose, Jasper, Emmett and Edward!" Alice said as if it was nothing while I started to hyperventilate. Edward was going to be there, me and Edward were going to be in a club together. Rose could sense my distress and asked me what has my panties in a twist. I was yet to tell them about my Edward obsession and was quite happy to keep it my little secret but my reaction let to much of what I was felling for me to play it off. I knew I could never lie to my sisters, they were one of the only things that I live for...so I told them the truth. They both squealed like little school girls when I told them and were talking to each other about how perfect this night was gonna be and how hot I needed to look. In my overwhelmed state I couldn't bare to hear anymore as it was all becoming overload, so I jumped into the shower to relax. 30 minutes later I reemerged all clean and relaxed. Alice and Rose had used this time efficiently to find me the perfect dress and heels. I was thrown in a cute black dress that fit me like a glove. It had tight ¾ black lace sleeves and almost no back at all, it also finished about an 2 inches below my butt. I was worried I looked too slutty but my sisters reassured me that once my hair and make-up was done I would be one classy lady...and they were right. And hour later I was sitting in a cab on my way to the club called Deluxe. My hair was now curled into nice waves that cascaded down my back and my make-up looked hot with the whole smokey eye thing going on. The girls looked great to with Rose in a tight white number and Alice in a cute short floral dress, of course there hair and make-up looked great too.

I could feel my anxiety levels building and building as we got closer to the club, lucky I had a drink before we left or I would be a shaking mess. Before we left the house us girls discussed the "how to get Edward plan", and it was simple. As soon as we got there I was going to strut up to him and talk until he talked back. I would flirt my ass off and make sure he got a clear picture of exactly how I wanted this night to end...done and done.

We arrived at the club 10 minutes later and was let in straight away even though there was a line. The club was very open as it was just on giant room, the back corner had the Dj and dance floor and along the far wall was a huge bar. We began making our way through the packed crowds to find the boys and boy did we find them alright. My plan was shot to shit as the three of them were on the dance floor, with Jasper and Emmett looking awkward and trying to stop the female attention they were getting. While Edward soaked it up and looking to be loving life with 3 blonde tramps practically dry humping him. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse Edward grabbed the girl on his left and started full on making out with her. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die! Alice and Rose decided to take pity on there boyfriends and go save them from the sluts. I pretended I was OK and told Alice and Rose I was fine when they asked me if I wanted to leave. When Edward eventually stopped sucking the girls face off he saw me and his eyes grew large as he drank me in, a small win for me. However as quickly as it happened, it stopped. Edward went back to sucking face and I went back to dancing solo as everyone else had paired off.

About 10 minutes late I was introduced to Jasper's friend David. He was about six foot tall with light brown hair and was very attractive. He seemed to have taken an interest in me as his hand became planted on my waist, with Edward enjoying his time with someone else I thought I would too. David spent the entire night buying me drinks and dancing with me and I found myself actually having a good time. Occasionally I would look over at Edward and found him glaring back at me. I wondered what his problem was, he almost looked jelous but let it go, his mood swings were not going to ruin my night.

Later on in the night I decided to go to the ladies room. I quickly excused myself from the group and headed across the room to the door. I was bursting at the seems so luckily there was no line. It was a small toilet, there was only about 5 toilets, and you could here a pin drop it was quite. I was actually getting embarrassed because I could hear myself pee when the room was suddenly filling with the noise of a girl crying and her friend comforting her. I could hear the crying girl sob saying

"How could Edward do this to me, we just had sex last week! I thought I was someone special when all he did was use me...good I feel so stupid!"

I immediately knew which Edward they were talking about. I actually started to feel lucky because even though Edward didn't want me, at least he didn't use me and crush me like this poor girl. I gave her a sympathetic smile as I walk out and started making my way across the room. Half way to the group I accidentally bumped into a slim slimy looking man with dirty blonde hair. I said sorry and kept walking away, to my discomfort he started to follow me. I could hear him saying stuff like "hey stop, wait up!" and "why won't you talk to me". Right as we reached our group I stopped walking and said kindly

"Look i'm sorry you seem like a nice guy but i'm just not interested!". To my utter disgust the man said

"You stupid up yourself bitch!" as he spat on my face, actually spat on my face and then moved to punch me. I closed my eyes and braced myself for impact and thought in my head, why do I always attract the phyco's! After a second when there was no impact I opened my eyes. To my surprise I saw Edward and the man on the floor with Edward throwing punches like a crazy man possessed. I didn't know what to do as I stood there in shock, my brain could not process what was going on. Emmett came a couple seconds later to pull Edward off and stop the fight, Jasper came to. No one else saw what happened and was asking Edward "what happened?" as they tried to calm him but he couldn't be calmed. Edward started screaming "Touch her again, even look in her direction and I will kill you! You son of a bitch!".

Rose and Alice now were at the scene too and where asking what happened. Rose turned to me to see me with tears in my eyes and spit on my face, as I was unable to move to wipe it off. You could see the thoughts ticking in her head and then she relized what must have happened. Her facial expression changed from confused to absolutly livid.

"You motherfucker! You thought you could try and hurt my sister! Over my dead body! Try to touch her ever again and I will be throwing your mangled corpse in a wood chipper...you hear me?" Rose screamed as she stalked over to the guy who was collecting himself of the floor. Alice rushed over to me while Rose was speaking and started cleaning me up and comforting me as i sobbed. At Roses words Emmett and Jasper clicked too as they looked at my horrific state. The situation was quickly getting even further out of hand as everybody but me and Alice looked ready to kill. Security finally made it to the situation and everything quickly disintegrated as they escorted the man out.

Everyone moved to me to see that I was OK. Everyone but the person I really wanted too. Edward was no-where to be found and I really wanted to thank him, he saved and protected me. His actions amazed me tonight and even thought the situation was horrible, at least I got to see that Edward really does care for me. I know that he would probably defend any woman who was in trouble like I was but the threats he made and how angry he got. Also the way he almost looked jealous tonight when I was with David. It all gave me a shimmering glimpse of hope that maybe Edward does care for me and like me. I smiled in hope and I knew exactly what I was going to do to test my theory.

**A/N: So did you guys like it? Pleasssssssssseeeeeeee review, please please please!**

**Next chappie will have some yummy lemons yayyyy! **

**All my love**

**xoxox**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello my little hunni pots, I have been insipired to write since with my last post my reviews have doubled. Everybody who is reading this story write now should be personally thanking PennyLane1223, Cupcake-Tears and Melissa Madden. Honestly without your reviews I would not be writing this for at least a week...so round of applause to you guys! You are my angels! **

*****MUST READ: This chappie is basically where staff fun(Original) comes into play but it has some HUGE CHANGES especially at THE END! so please re-read and not the changes because they will change the direction of this story for a while.*****

**Lemon alert!**

**Bella's POV:**

I thought it was quite funny how fast last night turn from champagne to shit, then back to champagne then back to shit, then back to champagne. The entire night turned out to be emotionally exhausting and threw me for a loop. Normally I wouldn't have thought anything of someone defending me but Edward doing and becoming a crazed man about it really shocked me a lot. Even more strange is the fact that Emmett told me today that it took hours to calm Edward down once they left the club, that the whole event really shook him to his core.

We had work together 2 days later on the Saturday for 4 hours during the morning. On the drive there I pictured in my head exactly how it was going to go. I was going to walk in and thank him for saving me, he would say "anything for you Bella!" and then he would kiss me and would start the epic romance we would have. I could not have been more wrong. I walked into the store to see Edward standing at the desk looking sexy as ever, playing with his bruised knuckles. I walked straight up to him, he must have known it was me because he didn't raise his had at all which would have been too rude if I were a customer. I decided to break the ice myself and bring up the whole club debacle.

"Hey Edward, how are you?" I said as I bent slightly to get his attention. It seemed typical Edward was back because he barely made eye contact as he said dismissively "Hi". I needed to thank him for helping me and it would just not sit right with me if I never brought up the issue. So I said

"Edward, I really wanted to thank-you for the other night at the club. I was so thankful for you being there and defending me.". Edward finally looked up after I was done speaking, patted me on the back and walked away into the back room without a word. I just stood there in shock, is he kidding me with the whole pat on the back. I hadn't been patted on the back for years and I sure as hell wasn't about to let it start now. I never realized just how much I wanted Edward until that moment of what felt like rejection. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

*****THE NEXT DAY*****

Last night I went home and whinged to Alice and Rose for a solid hour about how much I wanted Edward for myself. All that complaining led me to this moment right now, standing in the store with my uniform dark gray polo top that had Cullen's written on the back in white, with my tiny tiny black shorts on that barley covered my ass and my clean white runner which was also uniform. Normally I wear black sweats to work however Alice said I needed to look more slutty to seduce Mr Edward Cullen. She also took in my uniform top at the sides to make it tighter as well as doing my hair and make-up and i'm not gonna lie...i look pretty hot.

It was getting to 2 o'clock so Edward was due any minute to start his shift. I was getting very nervous about the whole idea, I have had sex plenty of times before but I have never wanted it this bad and it was never with Edward. Suddenly I heard the door bell ring alerting me off a customer, however in this case it was Edward. He strolled into the store with his normal blank expression on his face and he was yet to even look at me. In the last 4 months the boy has said all of 10 works to me, suddenly I was determined to make him crack.

"Hello Edward" I said innocently as I walked round the front of the counter that I was previous standing behind. I saw him look at me and I swear it looked like his eyes were going to pop out of his head.

"Ummm yeah hi Bella" he said as he stared at my legs. Good! I thought as my confidence boosted through the roof, time to really start to tease.

"Don't mind me here im just cleaning up the counter and shop" I said as I sprayed the counter with cleaning spray and bent over it to wipe it all off, making sure to make little "uhhhh" sounds as I stretched to reach the far spots away from me. I heard Edward groan behind me so without standing up I just looked behind me and said with a smirk

"is everything OK Edward?".

"yeahhh everything's fine thanks I just hit my toe" he said pathetically. I kept on cleaning the counter while thankfully no one else was in the store, when Inside Of You by Hooberstank came on the radio. I started swinging my hips and singing the song as I scrubbed the counter clean, still bent over. Suddenly I heard Edward say "Fuck it" as he walked towards the shop door. Ohhhh shit I thought as he went to leave. Then he flicked the sign to say Closed and turned back around smirking as he walked towards me.

I stopped dead in my track as I asked he warily "what are you doing?".

"Something I have been wanting to do for months now" he responded as he grabbed my hip and spun me back around pushing me up against the counter and stepping behind me so I was trapped between the counter and him. He hands were firmly on my hips and I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. Then he moved one of his hands up my side to my neck as his grabbed all my hair moving it to one side out of his way.

"Bella, Bella , Bella" he said before he started kissing and sucking my neck. All I could do was moan as it felt so good I could feel it in my toes. Edward grabbed my hips once again and spun me round so I was facing him then backed me up into the counter again. Then he leaned in and we started kissing...hard! His hands moved down from my hip and grabbed my ass, gripping it as all I could do was moan in his mouth as I reached up and grabbed at his sex hair. He stopped kissing me and as he was sucking on my neck as he asked me huskily

" Baby, by the end of this you are going to be screaming my name as you come on my cock. Would you like that huh? To come on my big, fat long cock as it rams into your wet pussy?".

"ohh god yes! Edward I want you to fuck me...i've wanted it for so long!" I said as he picked me up by my ass so I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me into the back room.

As soon as we were in the door Edward slammed me into the wall beside the door and we started kissing frantically. He let me down on my feet and we started making quick work of each others clothes. He took off my top as I kicked of my shoe and then quickly dropped my shorts. He said a low "Fuck" as he took me in in my black lace bra and thong. He quickly took of his top, shorts and shoes and I couldn't help but stare at his ripped chest and abs. He pulled me towards him and we started frantically kissing again as he took off my bra and started squeezing my tits while I moaned. Suddenly I felt his erection poking me in the stomach. So I ran my hand down his chest and stomach and started to stoke his dick and my god was it huge, I could barely reach around it it was so thick and long. I pulled down his boxer briefs and started to pump him when he pulled away from kissing, I was scared I was doing something wrong.

"Get on your knees baby" he ordered.

"what?" I ask timidly as he looked down at me with lust in his eyes.

"i said get on your fucking knees, im going to fuck your mouth." slowly I got to my knees as soon as I opened my mouth Edward grabbed the back of my head and rammed he dick in my mouth thrusting in and out so I could felt his cock touching the back of my throat. I was shocked at first and almost gagged but soon adjusted and started pumping the bits that wouldn't fit in my mouth with my hand.

" ohhhh yeah, thats it! Fuckkk this feels so good! Play with yourself for my baby, play with that wet pussy of yours for me!". Slowly I lowered the hand the wasnt pumping his dick to take off my thong and started circling my clit in tight little circles. I moaned as I started to feel good stroking my dripping pussy when without any warning Edward yanked me up and bent me over so my hands were on one of the walls.

He grabbed my hips and quickly slammed me back on his cock. "FUCK Edward.." I screamed as he thrust his thick dick quickly in and out off my pussy.

" Yeahhh fuck, baby you feel so good and tight! Fuck you felt good gripping my dick!" he yelled as he continued to thrust in my pussy.

I felt a smack on my ass and as I turn my head to see what I was I saw Edward spank my ass again hard. "ohhhh fuck!" I yelled "yeah you like that huh? me spanking your nice tight ass! I bet you do my little slut!" Edward yelled back at me. Edwards thrusts started to speed up and I could feel his balls hitting my pussy with each thrust. Edward then bent his knees and started thrusting at a different angle so he reach deeper inside me...and I loved it.

"Oohhhhh god...Edward shit! Fuck im gonna comee!". Edward then reach round my body and pulled me back to him while he kept thrusting harder and faster into me as he reached down and started to play with my clit.

"Fucck! That's it baby come on my cock! Squeeze that tight cunt of your and milk my dick! Fuck your sooo tight im gonna come too! Scream my name baby...scream who is giving you pleasure!" Edward yelled as he frantically thrust in and out of my pussy.

"Fuckk yes...right there! God! EDWARRRDDDD!' I screamed  
>as I came around his cock, squeezing it. Three more thrusts and Edward follows me screaming "BELLLAAAA" as he split his seed into me, lucky I am on the pill I thought.<p>

We collapsed to the floor with Edward still inside me. About 3 minutes later when we got enough strength to move Edward pulled out of me. I felt empty at the loss of him but completely satisfied. We lay there for a moment catching our breath as I lightly stroked his still bruised knuckles. I was just about to ask "so what's going on with us now?" when Edward quickly stood up and got dressed. I started to get dressed too but Edward finished first, he kissed me on the forehead and left without a word. The only words that were running through my head were "WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED!"

**A/N: OMG, isn't Edward a dick! Did you like the new chappie?**

**please please please review as they make me so happy and write faster!**

**All my love**

**xoxox **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello cupcakes, I hope you all are enjoying this so far and enjoy this new chappie!**

**Bella's POV:**

A couple of days ago I thought I had hit rock bottom. Well now I realize I was wrong because right now there is rock bottom, 50 feet of crap and then me! After having sex with the man of my dreams, some very hot sex I might add, he just up and left with not a word. I just finished getting dressed in the back room and now I stood here in the pits of depression. I felt dirty and like a slut, two feeling I never wanted to feel. It felt like the walls were closing in on me and I was suffocating. I was 20 seconds away from balling my eyes out and that is the last thing I wanted Edward to see. So I grabbed my stuff and stormed out, through the shop and out the door without one glance at the asshole formally known as Edward. I managed to get home and into bed before I broke down into hysterical tears. I was vaguely aware of my surroundings but I was beyond the point of actually giving a shit. I heard Rose and Alice come in and ask to know what was going on but after not getting a word out of my after 40 minutes they gave up and just laid with me.

_MONDAY..._

_TUESDAY..._

"Bella, this is getting ridiculous! It's been two day's and you haven't said a word or even moved. I want to know want is going on? What the fuck did Edward do to you? Bella...BELLA?" Rose yelled as I just stared blankly at the wall. After 10 minutes she stormed out of my room and slammed the door behind her.

_WENDSDAY..._

"Bella...Bella honey. You need to eat its been to long and I'm starting to get really worried! Please Bella just talk to me? Bella?" I heard Alice gently talking to me as she rubbed my back soothingly. All I managed to do was stare at the wall. Alice stayed with me for another couple of hours just hugging me from behind until I fell asleep.

_THURSDAY..._

Emmett waltzed into my room, ripped of my covers, tossed my body over his shoulder and started walking out of my room. When we reached my bedroom door and started heading towards the front door, I realized I was actually leaving the house I started to scream.

"EMMETT what do you think you are doing? PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW!" I screamed.

"NO Bellie Boo, we are going on a little trip! Good thing you wear sweats to be instead of pj's or I would have been in a dilly of a pickle." Emmett said as he laughed at the end. He tossed me quickly into the passenger seat and the rounded the car, I tried to escape but he good damn child locked the door. He jumped in the car and took off driving me away against my will. He rambled on about a whole lot of nothing for the trip until we hit a beautiful looking lake. It was huge and completely still with no-one else in sight.

Emmett dragged me out of the and plonked me on the rug that he put down, he also chucked me a blanket which I wrapped around myself tightly. He sat down next to me and said

"So little Bella it's time you and me had a little talk. Now I know something happened between you and Edward that has effected you an I know that you don't want to talk about it but Bella you need to talk. I have given you almost 4 full days to wallow and act how you want but now it is time for me to intervene. I promise I will never till a single soul what you tell me right now, not even Rosie and I promise to not joke about it either. Now talk...". I wanted to be a stubborn shit and not talk at all but I could see that Emmett was really trying with me right now so I figured he deserved the same courtesy from me. So for the first time in 4 days I started to talk.

"I had sex with Edward..." I said so quietly it was barely above a whisper. Fresh tears started to flood eyes and fall down my cheeks as I stared at my feet, to ashamed to make eye contact.

"OK, im guessing there in more to the story here. Soooo...".

I took a deep shaky breath and it took a few moments before I could say

"Emmett I really liked him, I thought this was all going to be the start of a beautiful relationship. Instead after all was said and done he didn't say a word to me, he just got up and dressed and left. Without a word, just left! I feel used and dirty! I have become a person I never wanted to come, and I'm mad at myself because i let myself become this way. I let Edward do that stuff to me with no promise of a future. This is all my fault"

There was a long moment of silence before Emmett said

"Wow I guess I should have let Rose kick his ass..." he went to kept talking but I cut him off.

"Whoa when was Rose gonna kick his ass?" I asked quite surprised because this was the first time I've heard of this.

"Ohhh you didn't know. On Tuesday night Rose came over to our house and was ready to kill. She was screaming and I honesty think if I hadn't have intercepted her at the front door before she could get to him, I think she would have chopped off his penis. She was livid!"

I really felt horrible about myself now for keeping my sisters in the dark about everything. I was being selfish and quite petty because even though I am ashamed in myself, I know my sisters would never judge me on my poor choices. I started to cry even more because it seemed that I couldn't do anything right now a days.

"Bella..." Emmett said softly as he moved to hug me. After a moment of consoling me I started to bare my sole. I figured I might as well tell him whats on my mind so he dosn't think im some crazy loon that cry's 24/7.

"I can't do anything right lately Emmett. I promised myself I wouldn't be the girl that was left wounded by Edward Cullen and that I would be a strong woman. Clearly all that has gone up in smoke because look at me now. Before Edward I had only had sex with one other guy. His name was Jake and he was my boyfriend for seven months. He was great and we ended on great term as we just fell out of love, we became more of friends than lovers. Before Edward my love life was fine and I never thought anything bad about sex. Since sex with Edward I feel like a slut, he made me feel worthless and replaceable. Defiantly not the feelings you want to be feeling after sex and now I got to face him constantly at work as the girl who he has had and now chooses isn't good enough to be with. I mean how would you feel if you had sex with someone and then right after gave you a kiss on the forehead and walked off without a word?"

Emmett gave me a chuckel and said

"i would feel like a champion..." and laughed, I smacked him on the arm hard and gave a small laugh too. He then stopped and said

"No seriously, if want happened with you and Edward, happened to me and Rose and she didn't talk to me. I would...move to Alaska! Seriously I can understand exactly why you are upset, Edward did a terrible thing."

Emmett gave me a quick comforting squeeze before saying

"First of all Edward is a dick and if I hadn't promised you my silence I would be giving him one hell of a spray for the way he has treated you. First and foremost Bella you are not a slut and I will never hear you talk about yourself that way again, OK? Secondly, from the get go I could tell Edward liked you. He has defiantly gone about things the wrong way and none of that is your fault. So time to get out of this frump you are in. Edward does like you, I can tell. So this is not the time to wallow in self pity and gloom. Now is the time to show him that you are strong and won't be put down by his actions. I know you may not feel happy now, so it's time to fake it until you feel it. Edward has developed a big head because for the last 4 or so year girls have been falling at his feet and in that time he has lost himself and forgets about others feels. At the end of the he is a good bloke and my brother, if you can stick with it and hold strong I think you will be the one that gets to him and changes him".

"Thank-you Emmett, I'm glad Rose found you!" I said after his little speech. It was the most I had ever heard Emmett talk and It was touching that it was to me. We sat there just staring at the lake for a while as we both just processed the thought in our heads. Emmett surprised me however when he ask

"So how do you know my dad so well?". I didn't want to lie to Emmett especially after out heart to heart but I didn't want his pity stares for the rest of my life either. I decided that he deserved to know the truth, so I said

"It's a very long and complex story. Back when your dad, Carlise, was a doctor I was his patient. When I was seven doctors discovered that two valves in my heart were not operating correctly and were causing a back flow of blood. I started to get sick to the point were doctors told my dad I only had 7 months to live as the valves were getting weaker by the day and would eventually collapse. Luckily your dad moved into town and brought with him a trail procedure that could fix my heart. It was extremely risky and I only had a 40% chance of living through the surgery. Thankfully it was a a success, obviously because I still live to this day but I am on constant medication and surveillance. My blood needs to be kept thin so it can pump through the bad valves easy but that leaves my open to a lot of sickness and a risk of fainting spells."

I took a long deep breath before continuing saying

" It was touch and go there for a while when I was growing. The demand on my heart was too great and they weren't sure what would happen as I was the first patient to ever have this done to them. It meant I was in hospital for over a year and was constantly returning, sometimes for months at a time. Bills grew so dad couldn't stay with me as much as he wanted, he had to work. So your dad would always come and keep me company. We became close because at hospitals doctors are all doom and gloom, but Carlise was always bright and kept happy. One day I was watching a movie and the characters lived with there uncle. I told Carlise how I wish I had a fun uncle like they did but Charlie was an only child. He told me he would be my Uncle and that if I ever needed anything that he was the man I go and to think of him as more than just my doctor. Its 11 years later now and I still get monthly check-ups and am on 2 tablets a day and your father is still my doctor and one of my best friends. He is practically family."

Emmett looked stunned for a moment before recovering and saying

"So your dad's heart girl...Oh my god!". He looked so sad and I could here the sympathy speech on its way so I quickly said

"Emmett I don't want to be treated or looked at differently. I am still the same old Bella so please don't tell anyone and don't treat me differently!".

Emmett looked at me like he had something more to say but he didn't. Instead he just gave me a quick hug and then tackled me to the ground. We rolled around laughing for a bit before he said that he better get me home before Rosie realizes I'm missing and chops his nuts off. I laughed and we began to head home. After talking to Emmett I felt OK about everything and knew exactly what to do to fix everything. Soon life would be good again!

**A/N: So did you like it?**

**Please review review review so I know what you think? Sorry if it has errors :)**

**All my Love**

**xoxox**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey Honey Pots, Thank-you to the two people how reviewed...you guys light up my life :) Hope you enjoy this chappie too..**

**Bella's POV:**

Traveling back home from the lake I started to form a to-do list in my head of all the things I needed to do to get my life back on track. First on the agenda was to explain to my sister's what has been going on with me. We were too close to each other to keep big secrets like this from each other. Even though technically it is none of there business what happens in my sex life, it just wouldn't sit right with me not telling them why I had such a huge melt down.

Emmett dropped me off at home before driving off. He said that he didn't want to be near Rose when she found out he took me, he said he feared for his "little buddy's safety" and it was his job to protect him. I laughed at that and walked in the apartment alone after saying good-bye. Alice was sitting on the couch when I entered. She looked up to saw me and got a strange confused expression on her face. She looked at me, then at my closed bedroom door which she must have assumed I was behind. She did this about 3 times before her expression turned to anger as she scream at the top of her voice

"ROSSSEEEE!". 0.2 seconds later rose came flying out of the bathroom in her pajamas and started scanning the room looking for the threat that made her sister scream like she was getting murdered. She was yelling

"what, WHAT?" but stopped as soon as she saw me. Strangely she did the same thing as Alice with the whole look at my door, look at me thing you would have thought they had rehearsed it. After about 5 seconds of this though Rose ran at me and gang tackled me to the floor with a strong hug, Alice soon jumped on top too. Alice was kissing my face frantically as I looked up I saw tears running down her face. I looked to my left to see Rose in a very similar condition but it looked as if she refused to let her tears fall. I gave them one more quick squeeze before saying

"Guys it's OK! I'm OK now...how about we sit down and have a chat so I can fill you in.". We sat down with me in one chair and Rose and Alice in another both comforting each other...great now I really feel like shit.

"Look guy I guess I owe you guys an explanation about why I have been acting the way I have been lately.." I said but Alice cut me off saying snappily

"Your damn right you do!". Rose rubbed her arm to shush her and then motioned for me to continue. I spent the next 30 minutes telling them both the full story on everything that happened and how I was feeling about it all. They were both very well behaved and didn't interrupt me once. Once I was done there was a minute silence before I heard Rose growl

"I swear to god if he does anything that upsets you again, I mean if even steps a millimeter out of line, you tell me OK? I will fuck him up so bad his body won't be recognizable!". Alice got up from her couch and came to where I was sitting. She started to play with my hair as she said

"Seriously Bella, if anything like that ever happens again you can't shut us out like you did. I was beginning to think you were one day away from jumping off a bridge, we were so worried about you. It was clear as day that you were hurting and we had no idea how to fix it because we didn't know what was wrong! Hands down worst 4 days of my life!" Rose was nodding along agreeing to what Alice said so I promised to never shut them out again.

"So what are you going to do about Edward then? And work?" Rose asked as we decided to relocate our conversation to the kitchen because we got the munchies. I hopped up to sit on our kitchen bench before saying

"I'm going to act fine with everything and be as cool as ice. I don't want for him to know how badly he effected me. I'm also going to tease him a little bit and without seeming obvious, make him regret the day he brushed me off like off food!". Rose gave me the look that I knew meant 'just be careful', I gave her my 'I will and thanks for caring' look. Before I knew it 5 hours had passed and we were still discussing my game plan for when I go to work tomorrow afternoon. I quickly excused myself as I went to call Carlisle to organize a check-up. I heard Rose snort in the other room when she heard me say "I've been great, thank-you.". He decided that he would stop by the shop tomorrow while I was there to give me a new prescription for my medication and check my heart rhythm is still good. It all sounded good to me so we said our good-bye's and hung up.

I could here Alice squeal in the next room so I went to see what her deal was. When I walked back in she decided to announce that she 'has the best idea everrrr!". I had to admit it was a pretty great idea, I was slightly jealous that I didn't think of it but I was happy none the less with the great plan we had for tomorrow. We spent the whole night watching children movies like Happy Feet, Finding Nemo and our favorite Madagascar. We always watched these movies and each had our own favorite characters. Mine was Melanie the hippopotamus, Rose's was Alex the lion and Alice's was King Julian XIII. We knew all the lines and would always say our favorite characters lines, this led to a huge fight because Alice would get over excited and always steal our lines. She pulled her head back in though when we started stealing hers.

I was trying really hard not to show just how nervous I actually was about work tomorrow but Rose read me like a book and suggested a sleep over in her room. She knew that if I slept alone I would just toss and turn all night but with her there I would sleep like a baby. Rose was my pillar of strength and always had a calming effect for me. I knew she had my back no matter what and with her radiating so much strength it made me feel OK to let my guard down and relax.

I arrived at the shop at 1 o'clock on the dot and walked in with my head held high, oozing fake confidence because god knows right now my confidence levels were slim to none. I saw Edward standing behind the counter and I felt my stomach drop. With the man that crushed my heart being so close to me it was very hard to keep my expression neutral, but I did it. I even managed to say hello to him and have a pleasant conversation with him for 3 minutes before getting to work. Edward tried to act like everything was normal too but I could here the surprise in his voice. Deep down inside I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to charge across the room and rearrange his pretty looking face instead of standing here feeling like my heart was being torn to shreds.

The entire day I could feel Edward watching me like a hawk. Occasionally I would throw him a flirty smile or bite my bottom lip just to get to him. A couple of time he would look like he was going to say something but then would back out and busy himself with something else. Around 3 o'clock I heard the shop door bell jingle and then I heard the sound I have been waiting for all day

"BELLY BOO!". I turned to see Seth standing there with a big shit eating grin on his face and his arms stretched out.

"BIG BOY!" I screamed back and then ran full speed into his arms. Seth picked me up and spun me round in circles. The moment I was in his arms the tension I was feeling all day disappear and I felt happy.

It had been almost a year since I had seen Seth and I had missed him like crazy. I met Seth in high school and we became great friends. We were inseparable all through school, so close that many people thought we were seeing each other. That was hilarious to us because Seth is gay. Luckily Edward did not know this so all he saw was me running into the arms of an attractive man. For a split second while Seth was spinning me Edward looked furious, but then he turned it off like a light switch and went back to 'not phased by anything' Edward.

Seth put me down genitally and whispered in my ear

"My word he is hot, I think I just came!". I started to laugh hysterically for the first time in weeks and hit Seth playfully in the arm. I didn't realize just how much I missed this kid until I saw him again, I simply adored him. We stood there with big goofy grins on our faces before we busted into our old secret hand shake. For a moment I was so rapped up in myself with Seth I actually forgot Edward was there. Seth was fully aware of my situation with Edward and decided to help me, we thought a little jealousy might motivate Edward into action a little. So Seth stayed for the remaining 2 hours of my shift. I could tell Edward was getting worked up as his jaw clenched and unclenched repeatedly.

I was enjoying the fact that I was finally getting the ball back in my court a little. Knock off time finally arrived and I told Seth to just have a seat while I finished up and then we would have dinner. After getting everything done Seth and I walked out. Just before we hit the door Seth whispered to me

"Let's leave him with something to think about hey sugar plum." before quickly grabbing my ass. I squealed like a girl and playfully hit his arm but nothing could overtake the sound of Edwards fists slamming down on the counter in frustration and anger. After all he put me though I felt no sympathy from him as we continued to strut out of the store without another glance at him.

**A/N: Did you likey?** **Favorite part?**

**Please make me a happy girl and review, I won't post again until I get at least 4...that's not that much to ask for...for me :) Also I just wanted to mention that am a very sensitive person so please if you don't have anything nice to say, please don't say anything at all! I got a review for my other story that I didn't like, it wasn't overly mean, it was just unnecessary so I just thought it was worth mentioning :) **

**With that I want to thank-you all for reading and hopefully I will hear your thought about it ;)**

**All my love**

**xoxox **


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello lovely readers, thank-you all so much for your reviews you guys make me so happy. I know my updating schedule has gone out the window and I do apologize as I have exams very shortly which means this cannot be my first priority :( but I have never forgotten about this you just have to bear with me :) anyways on with the story...**

**Bella's POV:**

Seth and I spent the entire day together just chilling on the couch and catching up. He was the perfect guy to get me out of my low moods lately and cheer me up, I didn't realize just how much I missed him until I saw him again. Rose and Alice had missed our lovable gay friend too and had apparently talked Emmett and Jasper's ears off

about him and all his lovable traits, so it came as no surprise when I received a text from Jasper saying:

**Hey Bella, how r u? Emmett and I were just talking and we wanted 2 invite u n ur bff over 4 dinner n a movie? Obviously alice n rose r coming 2...u in? Xo**

I quickly typed back

**Hey Jazz, im good thanks how r u? Yeah that sounds like fun of course me n seth will come...i no he really wants 2 meet u guys! Just let us no what time to come! C u soon xo**

I told Seth what the plans were for tonight and he was excited about meeting Rose's and Alice's boyfriends, after all he does love them like sisters and would like to get to know there significant others. The four of us, Rose, Alice, Seth and myself spent sometime fooling around playing Twister while we waited for 6 o'clock to come which was when

we're going to the Cullen's. It was my turn when Rose called "right hand blue!". I stretched myself out to be able to reach the dot when black dots speckled in my vision. I froze for a second, wondering what was happening to my body, when the dots disappeared and my vision was good again. I managed to get my hand to a blue dot and stay in that position, I breathed out a sigh of relief.

I started to think about how bizarre it was that my vision speckled like that when I realized that I couldn't remember the last time I took my medication. I remembered about a week ago that my bottle ran out and I have not gotten anymore since then. Realizing this sent me into a silent panic as I have never been without my medication for this long and I'm not quite sure what happens if I don't take them, all I know is that it's not good. I couldn't say anything about my current situation because Rose would have a bitch fit about it and send everyone into a shit mood for tonight which I did not want. We are all car pooling to the Cullen's too so I can't even stop on the way there, I will just have to wait and get some tomorrow. One more night can't hurt right?

About 2 hour's later we were all dressed and ready to go. We all got dressed in some nice dressy casual clothes, we are a good looking group. I was wearing a charcoal color scoop neck knitted dress with some legging and some boots. One great thing about my outfit was that I had some serious cleavage going on that made my boobs look great, if I don't say so myself. Seth gave me a big wolf whistle when he saw me and then spanked my ass. Seth was looking very nice to in a flannel checkered shirt and some tight jeans, Rose was laughing as she asked him if he was trying to steal her boyfriend. He gave her a wink and then laughed himself stupid. We all quickly piled into the car and headed over to the Cullen mansion. As we pulled up I saw Seth look in awe of the huge white house, I looked at him as if to say "yeah, I know what you mean".

As we walked up there front stairs I took hold of Seth's hand and held it with my own. To anyone that would see this gesture they would think it was something romantic. To us we know it was a gesture of comfort. Emmett and Jasper both know that Seth is gay and Seth gets very nervous and anxious meeting people for the first time who know this about him, after all there are a lot of homophobes in this world. Even though we both know that Emmett and Jasper wouldn't act that way it doesn't stop the feelings from coming to him. Seth really had not needed to worry because as soon as the front door opened he was engulfed in hugs by Emmett and Jasper. They were all saying how great it was to meet each other, I just stood to the side and watched with a smile on my face as my two sets of friends became friends.

A few minutes later us girls said our hello's too as we walked into the house and sat down for dinner. I felt bad when Carlisle and Seth had to pretend that they had never met each other at one of my check-ups as not everyone at the table knew my biggest secret, I was extremely grateful towards both of them.

We were all enjoying a wonderful dinner that Esme had made us and were sitting around the table talking and eating when we heard the front door open and close, followed by the sound of a female giggling. A few minutes later Edward and a pretty bleached blonde haired girl came in holding hands.

"Edward how come your so late! Dinner started 30 minutes ago." Esme scolded him as they approached the table. They both sat down with Edward sitting directly across from me and the girl sitting to his side.

"Sorry mum we got a little distracted..." He said as the girl started giggling again like she was in on an inside joke. Truth be told everyone at that table knew exactly why she was all happy.

"Everyone, this is Tanya. Tanya this is everyone..." Edward said politely as he started to serve himself some food. We all murmured back our hello's and continued to eat, however when Seth said his hello and introduced himself, Edwards head shot up quickly to give him a dirty threatening look. Seth just smiled back which I thought was so hilarious I could barely contain my laughter. Edward's eye's then shot to my face and then down to my exposed chest. After a solid 5 minutes of staring at my chest without saying a word I cleared my throat and quirked my eyebrow at him. He just gave me a lop sided grin before continuing eating.

Through out dinner everyone got involved in one big conversation that covered a variety of topics. That is everyone except Edward, he just ate and stared at my chest all night long. I was actually starting to feel bad for Tanya because after all she did nothing wrong to deserve the treatment she was getting. She had obviously fucked him before coming to this dinner, so she deserved a whole lot more than the silent treatment she was getting from him, I know I've been there too. She was actually a delight to talk to and was quite involved in our dinner conversation. She kept trying to involve Edward in the conversation but all he would give her were one word answers before going back to staring at me.

After a while dinner was over and all us kids moved into the family room to watch a movie. The boys decided the wanted to watch "The Hill's Have Eye's", I thought fuck no to that I don't want to be laying in bed scared shitless tonight. So us girls rejected that idea quick smart and suggested we watch "The Hangover" which everyone agreed on. While they were setting up the movie I decided I needed to go toilet and get I drink.

"Guys I'm just going to go to the toilet and then get myself a drink. Anyone else want one?" They all responded "No thanks" except Emmett who said he would like a Coke. After doing my lady business I made my way through the gigantic hall and into the kitchen to pour mine and Emmett's drinks. After pouring them however I heard some people having an argument, it was Tanya and Edward.

"I'm not going to just sit here and feel like a fucking idiot while you stare at another girl all night!" Tanya said with venom in her voice.

" I said I wasn't fucking staring at her, how many times do I have to say it!" Edward yelled back at her. I was feeling awkward and that I shouldn't be hearing this argument but unfortunately they were fighting where I needed to walk past to get to the family room, so I was stuck in the kitchen.

"I'm not slow Edward and you weren't exactly stealthy about it, it was very obvious to everyone at the table what had you so distracted at dinner!" Tanya yelled and I could tell she must be crying because I could hear her voice breaking slightly.

"So what I looked! It's not like I fucked her or did anything about it!" Edward said in a frustrated voice.

"If you really wanted me you wouldn't want to look...not for that long." Tanya said in a voice that sounded so hurt it broke my heart, the poor girl did not deserve what she was put through tonight. 3 minutes later Tanya walked past me, through the kitchen and out the front door. I was staring at where she left in shock when I heard someone clear their throat behind me. I spun around quickly to see Edward standing there looking so angry he was ready to blow.

"Why don't you just fuck off out of my life! All you have done is fuck it up!" Edward yelled at me from across the kitchen. At first I was hurt, but hurt quickly turned into anger as I yelled back

"Fuck up your life? We barely speak to each other thanks to you so I hardly see how I can seriously be affecting you! I have been nothing but kind to you and you have been nothing but a dick to me". Suddenly my heart started to beat a million miles a hour and a horrible stabbing pain developed in my chest. I clutched my chest with my right hand as I supported myself up with my left hand on the kitchen bench. I closed my eye's in agony and willed the pain away.

" You think your such top shit don't you! You know it fucking rude you bitch to close your eye's while someone's talking to you!" I hear Edward still ranting on which right now I no longer gave a shit about.

It felt like all the air had been taken out of my lungs and I couldn't draw in a fresh breath. My legs were weak and my vision was beginning to blur. After a few minutes of this I realized that this wasn't going to go away like my speckled vision before and that I needed help right away. Edward was still completely clueless about what was going on and was rambling on about how much of a rude bitch I was being, idiot! I drew in as big a breath as I could and managed to wheeze out a small

"Carlisle...". Edward stopped his continuing rant and said in a shocked and confused voice

"What?". Suddenly my legs gave way and I fell to the floor in a heap. I saw Edward move to catch me but he was too far away. My blurry vision had gotten worse and I could no longer speak, I wanted to but simply could not find the breath to. Edward must have finally clicked on to the fact that this was no act and that I needed some serious medical help.

"CARLISLE! HELP!" Edward screamed as he moved my hair off my face and rolled me onto my back. I heard footsteps all around me, along with crying and screaming.

"BELLA! Bella can you hear me?...Oh why haven't you taken your med's little one!" Carlisle's gentle voice washed over me as I was filled with relief because I knew he would take care of me.

"What the fuck is going on?" I heard Edward asking in a frustrated voice. I felt my eye's start rolling into the back of my head, my world suddenly filled with darkness. I could still hear Carlisle's rushed frantic words as he tried to help me. The last thing I heard was Edward's quite worried voice say

"She's going to be OK right?"

**A/N: SOOOOOO did you like, love or hate? I would love to get 5 reviews so everyone please take just a few minutes to push the button and show me some love. I really hoped you guys liked it! I will update as soon as I find the time which may not be for a while!**

**All my love**

**xoxoxox**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello you amazing bunch of people! OMG I cant believe how many of you reviewed the last chapter...when I read them all I actually said "Fuck me..." LOL! So a big thanks to Kim Swift, Alice Jacks, MignightReader1, Robin Kally, Edward's spouse, Alltimelowfanatic and Babe Pryor. And an even bigger thank-you to my regular reviewers Cupcake-Tears, Jeni K, SnottyScottie, PennyLane 1223 and rjcarreno77. You guys are my sun, moon and stars and I cannot express just how thankful i am! I hope you all enjoy this next chappie as much as you liked the last!**

**Rosalie's POV (****After dinner while in the living room setting up the movie):**

I believe Bella would be good for Edward, that she would be the girl to act as his catalyst for change. To stop his player ways and show him just how great a monogamist life can be. So needless to say that I support them getting together and want it to happen sooner rather than later. I know that this potential relationship will defiantly be good for Edward...but will it be good for Bella? I worry how this relationship will affect her, maybe there won't even be a relationship and he will just crush her free spirit. I want the 'Edward and Bella' fiasco to work out for the both of them, but that doesn't mean that i won't squash him like a bug if he hurts her!

He was pushing his luck though at the dinner we were previously at. He was staring at her tits for so long i felt like yelling "why don't you just take a fucking picture! It would last longer!". Normally him staring at her i would take as a good sign because it shows his interest in her but this time it just infuriated me because it was making poor Tanya feel humiliated, which she did not deserve. Emmett could tell I was getting irritated with the situation at the dinner at was stroking my thigh trying to calm me down, thankfully it was working.

I actually liked Tanya and became very fond of her over dinner. I was proud of her when we could her her yelling at Edward for the disgusting way he treated her tonight.

"I'm not going to just sit here and feel like a fucking idiot while you stare at another girl all night!" Tanya said with venom in her voice. I looked around the living room to see Emmett, Alice, Seth and Jasper all frozen in their spots around the room. It was clear all of us didn't care what we were doing previously and were now focused on straining going to hear the fight on.

" I said I wasn't fucking staring at her, how many times do I have to say it!" Edward yelled back at her. I really hope that Bella was still in the toilet because if she could hear this conversation I know she will, in the end, blame herself for this when none of this is her fault. That's just the kid of sensitive and loving person she is.

"I'm not slow Edward and you weren't exactly stealthy about it, it was very obvious to everyone at the table what had you so distracted at dinner!" Tanya yelled while obviously crying.

"So what I looked! It's not like I fucked her or did anything about it!" Edward said in a frustrated voice.

"If you really wanted me you wouldn't want to look...not for that long." Tanya said so softly I could barely hear her. My heart broke for the poor girl, I really wanted to rush in there and give her a big hug but I couldn't because then they would know we were all eavesdropping. A few minutes later we heard the front door open and close, we all looked at each thinking to ourselves that we all knew exactly who left and why they did. We all went back to doing our own thing in setting up the room for our movie night. I walked to the corner of the room to get the blankets from the cupboard when more shouting started. We all froze again and looked at each other like "More! What could they possible be yelling about now?"

"Why don't you just fuck off out of my life! All you have done is fuck it up!" Edward yelled. My face turned into anger because who was this asshole to be yelling at my sister like that.

"Fuck up your life? We barely speak to each other thanks to you so I hardly see how I can seriously be affecting you! I have been nothing but kind to you and you have been nothing but a dick to me". Bella yelled back and I couldn't be more proud of her for sticking up for herself like that.

" You think your such top shit don't you! You know it fucking rude you bitch to close your eye's while someone's talking to you!" Edward was ranting but his words took me by surprise. Why did Bella have her eye's closed? Was she trying to hold back tears or something? Edward was still yelling about a whole lot of nothing when he abruptly stopped. My heart dropped into my stomach when a few minutes later I hear a loud thud followed by Edward screaming

"CARLISLE! HELP!". I didn't even realize I was moving until I was in the kitchen where I saw Bella collapsed on the floor with Edward crouched over her, rolling her over to her back. A few seconds later I saw Carlisle fly into the room and change into doctor mode. He was checking her vitals and listening to her heartbeat when he said

"BELLA! Bella can you hear me?...Oh why haven't you taken your med's little one!". That was when I realized that this was bad, really really bad. I started to cry, it escalated until I was verging on hysterical. Emmett was trying to calm me down by telling me that the ambulance will be here any minute and she will be OK.

"You don't know that! You don't know how bad this is and what wrong with her!" I yelled at him out of pure frustration that my sister could be potentially dying on the floor and I can't help her.

"Actually I do know how bad this is and what's wrong with her." I heard Emmett say quietly from behind me. I turned around so fast I almost fell over and looked at him in surprise.

"She told you?" I gasped out in shock, it is very rare that Bella tells anyone about her condition.

"She told him what? What the fuck is going on?" Edward yelled in a frustration, clearly feeling out of the loop. Alice and I were crying so heavily that it was physically to hard to form words and talk. Jasper was looking just as confused as Edward and Emmett was refusing to tell them what he knew when they asked him, he kept saying that he promised her he wouldn't. Edward was looking like he was about to blow so Seth decided to take it upon himself to fill-in the boys on what they needed to know.

"Guys, Bella has a heart condition. When she was seven doctors found that two valves in her heart were not operating correctly and were causing a back flow of blood. She was very sick and was told that she only 7 months to live. That was until Carlisle found her and became her doctor. He performed the extremely risky operation that saved her life. She has been on constant medication and surveillance because her blood needs to be kept thin so it can pump through the bad valves easy. Carlisle says she wasn't taking her medication means the blood got to thick and could have collapsed her heart valve" Seth said. Edward looked like he could have fainted as he sat down on the floor next to her and held onto her hand for dear life.

"This can't be happening to me, not to her. She is perfect she can't be sick...Sh...She's my Bella." Edward choked out as he stroked her hand and fought back tears.

"She's going to be OK right?" Edward asked softly as he looked from Carlisle to me and back again. Our silence was clearly not the answer he was looking for as he let his tears fall. I knew exactly how he felt, it was a very surreal moment. When I woke up today I defiantly didn't think that my sister would be lying on the Cullen's kitchen floor, possibly dying. A few minutes later the ambulance was here loading her into the back of it. I was distraught that I couldn't ride in the ambulance with her to the hospital because Carlisle needed to be there for her medically, also so the could go straight into the operating theater as soon as they arrived at the hospital.

As soon as the ambulance pulled away from the house Alice and I completely feel apart. I'm not quiet sure what happened after that. All I remember is waiting in the waiting room for what felt like years until Carlisle came out and told us she was going to be fine for now and showed us to her room.

**Bella's POV: **

Beep...Beep...Beep...Beep!

For the love of god could someone please stop whatever that annoying sound was.

I am lying on what feels like a very uncomfortable bed in darkness as I can't find the energy to open my eye's. My chest feels weird, not in pain but just tight and odd. I eventually found the strength to open my eyes to find myself in a big hospital room with an IV running from my left arm. It was a very surreal moment when I looked around the room to see everyone I cared about asleep in various spots in the room. Alice and Rose were laying down hugging each other in their sleep on a couch to my left. Seth, Emmett and Jasper were all asleep on what looked like very uncomfortable chairs along the far wall opposite me. Esme was asleep in Carlisle's lap, who was also asleep in a chair but to my right. Last but not least was Edward. He was sitting on a seat that he must had pulled up to my bed and was now asleep collapsed on the edge of my bed while still holding my hand. Oh shit, Edward was _holding my hand? _Then it came to me because there is no way Edward Cullen would be holding my hand in real life...Fuck I died! Well that's just shit because this is defiantly not the way I wanted to leave this world and defiantly not this young.

I took a big breath in to calm myself when a searing pain started radiating from my chest. I looked down to see a fucking HUGE scar running the length of my chest. It started about an inch below my clavicle and finished where my ribs did. Well shit, at least I'm not dead but now I have this hideous scar on my body. I tentatively ran my right hand along the scar, it was so big it was overwhelming. I started to cry.

As a strangled sob left my lips I was everyone move to see what the sound was. Once they saw was awake they all moved around my bed to see me and touch me, whether it be to hold my foot, leg, arm or hand. Tears continued to pour down my cheeks as I sobbed and sobbed. I cried for so many reasons, I cried for the relief I felt for being alive and well. I cried for how loved I felt by those surrounding me, I felt special and treasured. But the main reason I cried was because I felt ugly with this huge scar running down my chest. If Edward didn't want me before, he is never going to want me or love me with _this_! Rose sat down to my right and pulled me down to her chest as her arms came around my shoulder to comfort me.

"Bella, Honey, your OK now. Your fine! Why are you crying?" Rose asked me in a calming voice as she stroked my back lovingly. I tried to stop crying but it just wouldn't happen for me. I tried to talk to answer Rose's question but I could only get out one word answers between my sobs.

"Alive...Happy...Relived...Loved...Hideous...U...Ug...Ugly." I struggled to sob out the last word as I collapsed into Rose's arm's. She rocked me back and forth as I heard Alice say

"Bella your could never be hideous even if you grew gills! You are NOT ugly because of one little scar!". I knew I was being irrational and emotional, that I should just be thankful to be alive and that a scar should be the least of my problems. After I calmed down a bit Carlisle explained to me that my heart was under a lot of stress right now and hopefully I could be out of the hospital in a week, depending on how my heart holds up and heals.

"Guys, why don't we leave the girls for a while and let Bella rest. We can come back tomorrow?" Jasper said to the group. Carlisle said that was a good idea so they all stood up to leave except Alice, Rose and Seth. They all wished me well and kissed me on the cheek before leaving. Edward was the last to go and it looked like he was extremely reluctant to leave. As he mover to kiss me on the cheek when leaving he hover near the side of my face and whispered in my ear so only I could hear

"You could never be ugly Bella, You. Are. Beautiful. Beyond words. Feels better love and I will have a long talk to you tomorrow.". Then he kissed me on the cheek and the forehead before squeezing my hand and leaving. Well that was unexpected I thought as I smiled at Rose and Alice who both had huge grins on their faces.

**A/N: Did you like it? Did you like Rose's POV? Please let me no what you think! Isn't Edward becoming all kinds of sweet! Please please please review!**

**All my love**

**xoxoxoxox **


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey pretty people, Thank-you all so much for your reviews on the last chapter...they make me giddy like a school girl :) I'm glad most of you seem touched by the tender moment at the end and are enjoying this story...please keep reading it only just getting good lol! On with the show...**

**Bella's POV: **

I felt like I was in hell. My normal optimistic attitude in life was shot to shit and I was more than happy to just lay in my hospital bed and not make any kind of communication to the world. After the Cullen's and Jasper left my mood disintegrated rapidly. Rose, Alice and Seth we're trying their best to keep me in good sprites and kept telling me that "Everything was going to be OK". I failed to believe them though because after all was it them who had their chest sliced in half and almost died...oh no wait that was me!

Why did bad things always happen to me? I was a good person. I was selfless and giving when I could be. I always listened to other people problems and helped others when I could. So why me?

The high school that I went to was a catholic school, which meant every Monday we had religious education. One particular session really spoke to me and I will never forget it. Mother Karen said to us

" God works in mysterious ways and sometimes it is not always clear why he is doing these horrible thing's to us. In those horrible times we tend to get so wrapped up in it all when what we really need to do is to step back from ourselves and look at the bigger picture. We all have destiny's set for us and everything that happens to us along the road only is there to mold us into the people we are suppose to be. So when all these horrible things happen you, you should think to yourself "what could I learn from this" and "How did this change me as a person" because we are all very capable of change, its weather or not we let it happen that matter's. Not all change is good and we need to distance ourselves from those changes and only embrace to good...that is what will make you all good well rounded human being's."

This was a very inspiring speech for me as it help put some positive light onto my shitty past. You see, all the sickness I when though when I was younger caused me to miss out on a lot as a kid. I never got to play sport or go to the park and play like other kids my age. While most kids hated going to school, I loved it because that meant I was not in hospital getting needles stuck in me. I will never forget when I was 11 and our school was having a production of the musical "Annie". For months before the auditions I dreamed about how I would star in the show and all the accolades I would receive after my brilliant performance. By some stroke of luck I managed to blitz the auditions and landed the main role to play Annie.

I spent the next 4 month's learning all my lines, songs and dances. After school most days I would come home and rehearse some more with Rose and Alice who were happy to so just to see me so happy and in my element. So imagine my shock when I found out 2 weeks before the show that some test results of mine showed some abnormalities. Apparently my hearts rhythm was not correct and I needed to go back into hospital for observation and undergo a painful procedure that involved a series of electrical shocks to fix the rhythm.

I spent the next month in hospital under observation. For days before the show and after it I was beyond depressed, my dreams were crushed. On the night of the show I sobbed in my hospital bed for hours on end. Rose and Alice came in that night and cuddled me in bed as we all sobbed in bed together. I sobbed for my now diminished dreams and they sobbed out of hurt for me. Rose year's later admitted to me that that night was the most depressed she had ever felt in her life. She saw how hard I worked on my part and how i was finally happy only to have it taken from me days before I could truly live it out. It crushed her to see me so emotionally hurt and had no way to make her little sister happy. But I moved on from that heart ache and it only made me stronger.

Even as I got older and in a more stable condition I still missed out on a lot. I couldn't go to the high school football matches like everyone else because the cold nights would strain my immune system too much. I couldn't participate in P.E, I couldn't eat certain foods and I didn't even get my first kiss until about 5 years after everyone else.

Through all those lows though and constantly missing out, I never let myself feel dejected or down and out. I felt all those experiences helped me to be molded into the free spirited and caring sensitive soul I am.

However now I feel like haven't I suffered enough already? I don't understand what I did to deserve this? Am I not already a good person...What more could I possible learn from this? Life has been constantly pushing me down and I have always gotten straight back up and on my feet. However with all the Edward drama's I felt like I was already down and now this whole drama is just kicking me while I'm down. This time I can't find my feet to get back up, this time I'm staying down.

As if I wasn't depressed enough as it was Edward never showed up the next day. Thankfully Rose brought my iPod in for me so could listen to one depressing song after the next. If I didn't already feel ugly and hurt as it was, well Edward just solidified those feeling in me by not showing up.

Over the next 3 days everyone but Edward came into see me to try and get me out of my funk. Alice brought dvd's, Emmett brought checkers, Rose brought book's, Esme brought baked goods, Carlisle brought me multiple teddy bear's and Jasper brought me my Guitar but none of those things cheered me up. The only person that could truly cheer me up never came.

Finally 4 days later I was reading in my bed alone when I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and gasped to see Edward standing there in all his glory.

"Can I come in?" he said quietly, to say he looked uncomfortable would be understatement of the year. He stood there shuffling from one foot to the other with his hands in his pockets. I nodded at him that it was fine so he slowly came in and sat down on the seat next to my bed. He immediately looked down and the floor and even after 5 minutes of silence he never made eye contact. I decided to break the silence saying

"You never came." I said in a soft voice as I stared at my hands that were on my lap. I saw out of the corner of my eye that he was now looking at me. He looked torn up inside and anguish was clearly written all over his face.

"I...I'm sorry. I need...I needed to get my head on straight before I could see you. So I would know for sure what I want." He said as he shuffled his chair closer to me and rested his hands on the edge of my bed. I looked up at him now and after starring at each other of a minute I said

"And what is it that you want?". He sat in his seat looking conflicted for a few moments before he said

"I'm not good at talking about how I feel and stuff like that...it's just not me. But I owe you the truth so before we talk about anything I need you to know how sorry I am for doing this to you, you will never know just how sorry I am". He said as he looked down to the floor looking almost on the verge of tears.

"Edward, you didn't do this to me. I have had a heart condition for years." his head snapped up when he heard he speak, he launched himself out of his seat and started pacing around my room. A couple of times he would stop as if he were going to say something, only then to shake his head and keep pacing.

"Bella, I know you will probably hate me after I tell you this but all this really was my...it was my...all my fault! I Overheard the d-doctors talking and they said it would have b-been stress that triggered this. I...I yelled at you-u, Screamed at you for no good r-reason. I stressed y-you and caused your heart...y-your precious heart to f-fail" Edward choked out as tears started to poor down his beautiful face. He sat back down in his seat and silently cried. It made sense to me now, he never came because he was off blaming himself and beating himself up about it so bad that he felt to much guilt to see me.

"Edward, listen to me when I say that none of this is your fault OK...none of it! It was part my fault because I shouldn't have been so stupid in not taking my medication and the only other person that can take blame in this is god, for giving me this dodgy heart. Please don't feel guilt for something that you have no reason for feeling guilty for." I said as I stroked his head. He looked up at me and with tears in his eyes said

"You amaze me Bella Swan...". I just stroked the side of his face as he lent into my head. I saw his eye's shoot to my guitar in the corner of the room. He stood up and went and retrieved it before returning to his original place in his seat. He started checking to see if it was in tune.

"Can you play guitar?" I asked quietly. He didn't look up when he said

"Yeah, Carlisle taught me from when I was just a little kid. That man has so many talents I swear..." he trailed off. After he finished tuning it to his liking he looked into my eye's and said

"Remember how I said that I'm not good at talking about my feeling..." He asked me and I nodded.

"Well while I was brooding in my these past few days I wrote you a song. If it's any good I suppose it will show you just how I feel about you." He said before he started to play a beautiful melody. I was captured in it from the very first cord he played. Then in his beautiful voice he started to sing (**A/N song is Long Time Coming by Oliver James...Listen to it while reading to understand)**:

_Everybody wants to be loved  
>every once in a while<br>we all need someone to hold on to  
>just like a helpless child<br>yeah  
>can you whisper in my ear<br>let me know it's alright  
>it's been a long time coming<br>down this road  
>and now I know<br>what I've been waiting for  
>and like a lonely highway<br>I'm trying to get home  
>oooh loves been a long time coming<br>you can look for a lifetime  
>you can love for a day<br>you can think you got everything but  
><em>_everything is nothing when you throw it away  
>yeah<br>then you look in my eyes  
>and I have it all<br>once again  
>it's been a long time coming<br>down this road  
>and now i know<br>what I've been waiting for  
>just like a lonely highway<br>I'm trying to get home  
>oooh loves been a long time coming<br>didn't know i was lost  
>till you found me<br>uh huh  
>didn't know I was blind<br>but now I see  
>can you whisper in my ear<br>let me know it's alright  
>it's been a long time coming<br>down this road  
>and now I know<br>what I've been searching for  
>oh been a long long highway and<br>now I see  
>oooh loves been a long time.<em>

He finished singing his song and placed the guitar up against my bed. I was so touched tears were flowing freely down my face. He felt it to...He liked me to! I quickly sat forward and fisted with one hand his white t-shirt to bring him towards me, before taking my other hand and weaving it up in his hair to bring his face down to mine, my lips finding his. I kissed him with all the passion I had as his hands moved down to my waist.

We stopped kissing and he was now bent over my bed. His head was hovering over mine as he brought his hands up to cup my face as he stared into my eyes.

"But I'm ugly now..." I said shyly as I looked away from him. He moved my head so I was once again looking at him before he said

"You will always be beautiful to me, my Bella." Then he kissed me again.

Everything made sense to me now. All this wasn't about me. This time the horrible time's weren't about shaping me into a different person it was about shaping Edward into a better person. I was to wrapped up in my own depression to even think about who else this was affecting. I should have taken a step back to get a different perspective, but I didn't. Now I have and everything is clear...now I have Edward.

**A/N: Soooooooooo did you love it? Wasn't Edward sweet? Did you like the song? I thought it was perfect! Personally I think this is my favorite chappie so far...is it yours? And if not than what one is? Please please please leave me a review...they make me so happy :)**

**All my love**

**xoxoxox**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello again my loves, once again I would just like to thank all those who took the time to review...im sending you all virtual hugs and cookies! Sorry this is about of a nothing chapter but it is nessisary for time time line of the plot! i promise things will pick up again next chapter :) Hope you all like this chapter too!**

**Bella's POV: (2 weeks later)**

Insecurity's are a powerful thing to any human being. Men, woman and children, we are all capable of having one. Something as simple as a slightly bigger nose, a pimple, a big butt or unwanted facial hair. These are all things that can make someone question themselves or feel insecure...to all these people i say 'try having a huge 11 inch scar  
>down the center of your chest!'. Luckily I have someone that they don't, I have Edward.<p>

These last 2 weeks Edward has been great with me. He has barely left my side at all so we have spent day after day kissing, cuddling and watching movies. If it weren't for the nurses coming in every 5 hours to prick me with a needle I would think I was on a holiday. Tomorrow is the day doctor's have agreed to release me, it wasn't suppose to happen for another week but I managed to sweet talk uncle Carlisle into getting me out early because I was getting very restless staying in this confined room. However, like everything in my life this process is not without its drama.

I have been told to say on my very strict medication schedule which requires me taking blood thinners 5 times a day, anti-hypertensives 3 times a day, antibiotics twice a day and some pink liquid shit that tasted like methylated spirits once a day. For me to be able to leave to hospital I also have to be moved into a completely sterilized room with an air purifier to be able to keep me on the mend. This is what has caused Edward, Emmett, Rose and Alice to be having a very heated argument in the hallway outside my room.

"She is staying with ME! We have the proper facilities to keep her well. This is about HER not us!" Edward yelled at Rose and Alice.

"I know this is about her or are you forgetting that she is MY LITTLE SISTER! I would always put her and her health first! I love her and she deserves the comfort of her own home!" Rose yelled back with Alice nodding along side her. Emmett then decided to interject saying

"Babe calm down...but Edward is right-"

"WHAT!" Rose screeched and glared at Emmett.

"Babe just listen to me. Esme spent the past 2 days scrubbing and disinfecting every inch of that house and brought about 20 air purifiers. Health and preparation wise I think our house is the better option." Emmett explained to her while stroking her arm.

"NO! I can't be without my sister in her time of need for however long she needs to stay in this environment! Jasper do something..." Alice pleaded to him who was sitting down close by.

"Emmett! if you take her away from me I swear to GOD this will be the END OF US!" Rose yelled at Emmett threateningly. This was beginning to snow ball fast as Rose looked like she was ready to murder everyone else in the room to be able to steal me away. Thankfully Jasper, the only logical thinking person out there, asked

"Why don't you guys just stay with them? Alice can stay with me in my assigned room there, Rose can stay with Emmett, Edward in his room and Bella in the super clean Guest room.". Alice launched herself at Jasper and tried to kiss his face off while everyone developed these huge smiles like they found the cure to cancer. Finally they found something they could agree on and came back into my room. I started to laugh when I heard Emmett say to Rose

"You wouldn't really have broke up with me over this would you have baby?"

"Yes, I really would have..." She said with a big shit eating smile on her face as she got up on her tip toes to kiss him on the lips. Edward was the most happy out of the lot of them, with me staying in his house no one could wipe the smile off his face.

The next day I was released from hospital and taken to the Cullen's. It was embarrassing being wheeling through the hospital with an oxygen mask on, to protect me from other people's illnesses but well worth it when I finally escaped that place.

I arrived at their house only 25 minutes later and was rushed into my room by Esme who said and I quote "can't have you dieing on my watch, I think Carlisle would divorce me!". She then rushed back to the front door where I heard her greet the others and explain to them how the house was going to run from now on. I could faintly hear her say

" Welcome home everyone, girls and Jasper we are delighted to have you staying with us. First things first thought...to protect Bella from illness the house needs to stay completely germ free. What this means is that when you enter the house you MUST take off your shoe and leave them outside, spray yourself considerably with the generalized disinfectant to get the germs off your clothes then lastly you need to rub your hands with the hand sanitizer. If your going to visit Bella in her sterilized room you must repeat this whole process again right before you enter her room. No being lazy and doing this half ass-ed do I make myself clear?". This was followed by a chorus of "Yes Esme's" and "Yes mum's". I started to giggle to myself when I heard Rose say to the group

"If I catch anyone not doing this all correctly and risking Bella's health I swear to god I will be burying that person in the hill's and I'm sure Alice will help me drag the body!". She always was the dramatic type.

They all quieted down after that so I started to take me room in, it was really beautiful. It had cream and gold walls with a big white bed on the far wall that had a cream and gold colored headboard. With two big white bed side tables either side of the bed. They was a huge flat screen T.V opposite the bed and that was all that was in the room, except for the 20 air purifiers that lined the walls...thank god they don't make that annoying humming sound or I would have gone insane. I was still taking in my new room when I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist and someones head resting on my shoulder, I instantly knew it was Edward.

"Do you like it?" He asked as he kissed up and down the side of my neck.

"Yes I LOVE it and compared to that hospital room this is practically the Hilton." I said as I lulled my head to one side to give him more of my neck. He quickly scooped me up and carried me bridal style to the bed before rolling over me to cuddle up on my other side. We were just about to start another one of our steamy make-out sessions when we heard heavy footstep coming closer and then Emmett started to run into the room with a big smile on his face. He only got about four steps into the room with Rosalie appeared out of thin air and grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, dragging him back out of the room. Emmett who was shocked started flailing about and screaming as he stumbled out of the room. As soon as they were out of the door Rose starting hitting him and yelling

"YOUR NOT CLEAN YOU STUPID IDIOT!".

"I'm sorry babe, I just got excited and forgot. STOP HITTING ME WOMEN!" Emmett yelled and squealed while trying to shield himself from Rose's blows. 3 minutes later Rose finally got tired and stopped hitting him, while she was panting and Emmett was on the floor when a 'clean' Alice glided into room. She jumped on the end of my huge bed by my feet and started bouncing around on her knee's.

"Guess what, guess what, guess what?" Alice said loudly as she bounce on her butt at the end of my bed excitingly.

"Pigs can fly now?" I said excitingly too to make fun of her current state of mind.

"No you silly sausage! Esme brought 'Scene it" for us? We are going to have a game night!" She said and then started clapping really fast like a maniac on speed.

"Aliccceeee, I shot gunned telling them! You ruined it all for me! Rossseeee tell her off!" Emmett whined from the door as Rose was spraying him with disinfectant.

"Stop acting like a baby! If you had of followed the rules then you would have been able to tell her yourself! So suck it up!" Rose said before she kissed Emmett quickly on the lips to cheer him up at bit. With Emmett acting like spoilt child, Alice acting like she was on speed and Rose having to play mother hen, Edward and I were in hysterics by the end of it. We all gathered around on my bed and played the game on the big flat screen TV I now had.

We all played in 3 teams, so each couple were a team. Alice and Jasper won which led to a very grumpy Emmett, I swear that boy was a toddler inside. I could understand his frustration because normally I was a very competitive person to and would crack the shits too if I lost. It's funny though, while I'm sitting here in Edward's arms and surrounded by my friends and family I could not be more content. I am happy!

**A/N: So did you like it? Sorry this is a bit of a short chappie I couldn't think of anything else that would fit in this time frame! Quick question for you all...who is your favorite character now? I have a soft spot for Emmett and Rose but what about you? Next chappie will be much better and may have a lemon so yayyyy! Hope you are all well!**

**All my love**

**xoxoxox**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey darlings, it's meeeeee again lol! So I know the last chapter was not all that great but this is where things start to spice up yaayyyy! Hope you all like it :) It's extra long and lemony so I hope you love it :) **

**Bella's POV:**

**5 month later**

I was finally out of the house, breathing in the fresh air and listening to the birds chirping. To say I am a happy girl would be understatement of the year.

These past 5 months have been hell on earth but thanks to Edward, my sisters, the Cullen's and Jasper it has been bearable and at times even fun. I think any normal logical human being would start to feel suffocated and claustrophobic being in the same room for months on end...this is why I was more often than not moody for the last 3 months. Some days I was happy, some days I was depressed, some days I loved company, some days I just wanted to be alone, some days I would cry for hours on end because I couldn't do the little thing like collect the mail and some days I would laugh hysterically over something trivial like Emmett having the hiccups.

So as you can tell predictable was not my middle name but thankfully I was surrounded by people that truly loved me and was willing to take each day as it came with me. Edward was my saving grace through this whole ordeal. He would comfort me when I cried, hold me while I slept in my tried days, make sure I ate on my grumpy days and laugh with me on my good days.

There was also those other days...i called them my horny days when all I wanted was to have hours of heart stopping sex. OK maybe not the best saying to use given my current situation but you get the idea. Edward was being a stand up gentleman and refused to give in to my requests, he said he was to scared to hurt me. He said sex or any kind of fooling around could raise my heart rate and make thing worse. He would always tell me one day soon but just not right now.

Some days I could understand his reasoning and would be touched by the fact that he cares enough for me to refuse sex because I know deep down he was wanting to be intimate as well. Other days however I was sensitive and would cry for hours because I felt ugly and rejected. I knew that I was not being fair to Edward since he was just doing what was right. Edward knew I was just being emotional though and never took anything I said or did to heart, like I said he was my sun when all I was surrounded by was dark clouds.

Even though we have been practically living together for the past five months Edward and I are still to say 'I love you' to each other. Some might say this is weird but we have came up with our own special way of saying it without actually saying it.

One day after being rejected by Edward I was lying on my bed crying, facing away from him because I was so humiliated I just didn't want to see his face.

"Why are you crying pretty girl?" he asked from behind me as he rubbed up and down my back.

"B-because you don't want me...you don't love me." I sobbed out as I curled myself into a ball on my side.

"My silly girl you know I want you...of course I want you. I don't want to say _it_ to you because right now is not the right moment and when I do say _it_ I want it to be special. I want it to be because I wanted to say it to you to express how I feel about you not because of some silly sex fight we had. So this all I'm going to say for now...i don't not love you". I understood what he was saying and I was touched by what he said, at that moment I have never loved him more. So I turned around so I was facing him and kissed him hard on the lips. It was a searing and filled with love and passion kiss that told me everything I was feeling for him, he felt for me. As we broke away in need for oxygen I lent my forehead against his and said

"I don't not love you too". That is how our own personal way of expressing our love came about and we were constantly saying it to each other like before we hang up the phone or before we go to bed.

This is what leads us to now. I have finally been told that I have recovered enough to live like a normal person. No more air filters and sterile rooms for me, I was a free woman. So Edward and I decided to go to the park and feed the ducks, it was just a light outing to test how I would go. We drove down and walked to the lake hand in hand. It was an average day for Washington so it was cold but thankfully not freezing or raining. We are rugged up in all our layers to be safe. We walked down to the lake side and Edward broke up little bits of bread and handed them to me so I could feed them. We were quickly surrounded by ducks and I was laughing at the one's who braved the banks of the lake as they wattled around swaying their little bum's. They were just so cute it made my heart swell. Edward loved watching me be so happy so he broke out his phone and started taking pictures of me with the ducks.

I was starting to run out of bread to feed them with when I spotted a mother duck swimming her way over with about 8 little tiny ducklings following along behind her in a straight line.

"Look Edward...Look! Aren't they just adorable." I squealed out as I pointed to the tiny ducks.

"I know baby, I know." Edward said back as he was now taking a video of me. I was now surrounded by about 10 normal sized duck as well as the mother and her ducklings. I fed the mother first and then went to fed the ducklings but the other bigger ducks would steal it out of my hands before I could get it to them. After 7 failed attempts at feeding the little ducks I started to get annoyed and frustrated.

"Edwarddd! The bigger ducks keep stealing the little ducks food!" I complained as I looked at him for help. He just laughed at my childish whinging as he put his phone back in his pocket and walked over. He took the bread from me and ripped in into shit loads of little bits. He then split the bits in half and threw one half as far as he could away. As all the big ducks took off toward the bread he quickly threw down the second half of the bread down to the slow baby ducks. I listened to them all quack in satisfaction and I threw myself at Edward and kissed him quickly.

"That's why I don't not love you, you always know how to make me happy!" I said as I wrapped my arms around his waist and kissed his chest. He threw his arms around my shoulders and brought me even closer to him.

"I'm here to keep you happy and you make my smile...my beautiful girl." He said as he kissed my head. We stood in our embrace and watched the ducks wattle away once they realized that we had ran out of bread.

We eventually made our way back to the Cullen's house and was met with a very grumpy Emmett. As we walked in the living room he turned his head away from us like a pissed of child.

"What's going on Em?" Edward said in a very amused voice.

"I'll tell you whats up _brother_. I come down from my room in a great mood this morning ready to have fun with my brother and you can just _imagine_ my surprise when I'm told that you guys had already left! And to feed ducks Edward..._ducks!_ You know I love the ducks!" Emmett spat as he turned his head away from us. Edward looked like he was going to laugh so I quickly elbowed him in the ribs...hard. I gave him the look that said ' you better fix this right now'. Emmett may look like he belonged in a MMA fight or deep in the woods, but truth be told he is a gentle giant that just liked to be included in everything.

"We are sorry Emmett, we just weren't sure how well Bella would go on her first outing and I didn't want an audience for it if it didn't go well. Next time I promise you can come with us and I have photo's you can look at for now if you want?" Edward asked.

"Photo's?" Emmett said as his face lit up with a smile, I laughed at his silly ways. Everyone came to the main computer and we all gathered around to see the photos. They "ohhh'ed" at all the cute ducks and my happy glowing face. Alice called Edward a perv when a photo of my ass appeared on screen, everyone laughed when the next photo was of me flipping Edward the bird.

Later that night Edward and I were lying in his bed watching "Friends" on his TV. I decided to test my luck and that I was not going to back down this time, no is not an answer I was excepting this time.

I brought Edward down to me for a long hot kiss that left me breathless. I quickly rolled on top of him and dug my hands into his hair. His hands immediately found my hip and when them started to roam around to my ass. I let out a deep moan that could have rivaled any porn star. This seemed to snap Edward out of the moment and he started trying to pull me off his lap.

"Baby, you know we can't do this. Not yet..." He said as he tried to move me but I refused to budge.

"shh shhh shhhhh! This isn't going to be about me, it's going to be about you! We will take this slow and you can just lay back and enjoy the ride." I said as I looked into his eye's. I could tell he didn't like the idea of this but my determination to do this must have shown through because for once he didn't fight me on it.

I kissed him long and hard as I grind my hips against his. I was wearing these tiny blue short short and a thin white tank tops. Edward was wearing a tight white t-shirt and some black tracksuit pants. Perfect clothing choices if you asked me because I could feel the heat of his body through my clothes and as I grinded my hips even more I could feel his dick start to harden through my shorts. My hands were tangled in his sexy hair and his were rubbing my thighs lightly and my hips.

I could feel myself start getting wet from having some intense dry sex after my almost 6 month drought. It was very hard for me not to just drive in and take him how I wanted to but I knew Edward needed me gentle for his peace of mind, small steps for now.

I quickly yanked off my own top and then his quickly followed. Edward let out a strangled grown and that when I remembered that I wasn't wearing a bra, so Edward was seeing my tits for the first time in a long time. I decided to really remind him of what he was refusing to have these past few months as I lent myself back on my knee's, still

straddling him so he could see me flushed, topless and only in short shorts wanting him.

I sucked on my index finger and then slowly dragged it down his bare chest leaving a trail behind. As my finger got lower to his lower stomach i could see his muscles twitching with excitement and pleasure...he may say he doesn't want me but his body screams that he does. I gave his pant bulge a quick pat and squeeze before I brought both

my hands up to squeeze and cup my tits.

"Did you miss these big tits Edward..." I asked in a husky voice as I rubbed my left nipple and squeezed my right tit. I saw him gulp and pant before nodding slowly. I lowered my front and rubbed my breasts over his bare chest. I kissed and sucked at his neck before I whispered in his ear

" You can say you don't want me all you want but your body tells a whole another story...". I kissed across his chest before continuing whispering in his other ear

" Like how hard your cock is right now. I know all you want to do is bury it in my hot, tight, wet pussy...but your not gonna get that today...because I want you in my mouth and down my throat...".

Edward let out a long moan at my words and I started to kiss down his chest. As I licked just above the band of his pants and went to put them off with my hands I felt Edward put his hand on mine to stop me.

"Baby girl, you don't have to do this...". He went to say more but I quick shut him up by saying

"But i want to...really just lay back and enjoy sexy boy.".

I kissed his stomach and sucked a little bit as I slowly brought down his pants and boxers. Clearly we had had enough foreplay because when Edward cock was finally released from its fabric prison it was so rock hard it almost hit me in the face.

It had been so long since I had seen his dick I actually forgot just how magnificent it actually was. I sat back on my knees which were either side of his legs and just stared at its long, hard, thick beauty. It twitched with me staring at it and that's when I snapped out of whatever I was in and went to work on pleasuring Edward.

I grasped his cock which was so thick I could barely wrap my hand fully around it and pumped him slowly. As I would reach the head I would twist my wrist which made him moan and grasp the sheets in pleasure and restraint. I thought to myself that this was going to be over a lot quicker than I thought it would be because after all he had been almost 6 months without another persons touch too. So I quickly bent down and sucked him as far into my mouth as I could.

"Fucckkk...ohhh shit baby!" Edward moaned. I worked him as far into my mouth as I could while trying not to gag. I tell you I have no idea how this ever fit inside me because Edward has one monster dick that would destroy any pussy it came across. I was moaning around Edward while I felt his legs start to shake. I knew he was close to loosing it so i gently grabbed his hand which was clenching at the sheet and

brought it to my head. For added effect and to get him really worked up I added a

"Come on sexy boy...control me! Control me sucking on your monster cock!". Edward snarled so loud he sounded like should be animal plant before he grasped a big chunk of my hair and all but force my my mouth on the cock. He was pushing my so deep that I could feel the head of his dick slipping in and out of my throat with each thrust.

"Come on baby, take it! Take my cock in your nice hot mouth for me! God you feel so good...uhhh uhhh...ohhh fuck..Jesus!" Edward shouted as his hips started to jerk off the bed. I moaned around the dick and that was all it took for Edward to scream my name as he came down my throat. I quickly swallowed everything he gave me and then leisurely licked him clean. When I was done I looked up to see a concerned Edward

"Are you OK Bella? Jesus I just lost it and couldn't control myself anymore, please dear god tell me you are OK?" He asked in a panic. I kissed the tip of his dick one last time before covering him back up with his pants and moved up the bed to kiss his lips. After 5 quick pecks I said

"I've never been better, but thanks for asking.".

"Thank-god, I so don't not love you! Now about you..." he said as he tried to take my top from me which I was trying to put back on.

"No baby, no me for tonight! This was all about you!" I said as I quickly shoved my top back on. I moved into Edwards arms to cuddle and suddenly felt very tired.

"I don't not love you.." I said before I closed my eyes.

"I don't not love you too." I heard Edward say before I drifted off to dream land.

**A/N: So did you love it...please please please review! I think I did a good job but I would love your opinion. Did you like the ducks and the I love you bit? Please tell me!**

**All my love**

**xoxoxox**


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